Is this what a feminist looks like? (Millions of women hope so…)

(Photo: Feminist Ryan Gosling)

So maybe Ryan doesn’t really want to cuddle with me and read me Julia Kristeva.

Quel dommage.

It’s a funny thing, though. I’ve noticed lately that it has become increasingly acceptable to be sexist, objectify, and lust––as long as you are a woman. If I were a male blogger, and stuck up a picture of some cute starlet saying all she wanted to do was cater to my needs, it wouldn’t be seen as funny or cute. Definitely not “mindful.”

And yet, when I was hanging out with some female friends recently talking about celebrity crushes and the benefits of combining Ryan Gosling and some frosting, it made me stop and think. Why is it OK when we do it? Isn’t the point of being a feminist (or a humanist) that we all want to be treated equally? If it isn’t OK for men to objectify, why do we think it’s acceptable behavior for women?

Is it the cougar phenomenon? I’m not “cougar age” yet, but you’d have to be hiding under a rock somewhere not to notice this trend. Women in their 40’s aggressively hitting on younger men? If it’s sad and creepy when men do it, why is it suddenly OK for women? We may have come a long way, but if that is where feminism gets us, we’ve come a long way in the wrong direction!

So what is the answer? It doesn’t seem in keeping with being a mindful, compassionate woman to talk about men like they are merely of value because of their bodies. If we don’t want men to leer at us in our yoga pants, why would we do the same to them?

A male friend said that it isn’t the same because men don’t mind being treated like sex objects.

I can’t answer that one. Maybe some of our male readers can shed a little light on that for us. In the meanwhile, I will keep my sexist comments to myself. Should Ryan Gosling show up on my doorstep wanting to snuggle and read to me, I would treat him as an equal. I would not “accidentally” drop things on the floor so I could leer at him as he picks them up. I would not make him clean my house shirtless as I sat reading, glass of wine in hand and making lewd comments as he worked tirelessly. Really, I wouldn’t! Because, after all, I am a feminist. I believe that we should all be treated with respect. Even Ryan Gosling.

(Photo: Socialite Life)