I have a confession to make.

This week a Facebook friend won an awesome prize. I was happy for her, but also felt some sort of discomfort in my feelings. They just weren’t authentic.

I was taken aback by this and knew I had to explore deeper to uncover the “why” of  it.

“How could you not be happy for her? Geez, what an ungrateful b*** you are Jan. C’mon are you kidding me? Look at what she’s been through; she deserves some joy.”

All these thoughts, and more, ran through my head.

Alternately, sitting on my other shoulder, ungrateful gremlin kept saying stuff like, “Well I’ve been through a lot too. I work hard, I deserve it too.”

Welcome to the pity party that was in my head. Geesh.

Thankfully, because I’ve learned so much from my coaching, I recognized my insecurity and called it out fairly quickly.

“Ok, pity party’s over folks. Move on. Nothing to see here.”

That was basically the conversation in my head after I took the time to process my feelings.

Flipping the perspective allowed me the ability to share in her joy and to be grateful for her gift. I was putting negative energy out into my world and it was coming right back to me like a magnet because what you reap you sow.

I felt rather ashamed of myself for my feelings but, hey, I’m a human being human and there will be mistakes.

My big take away on this whole thing?

The universe is a most glorious place and every breath we take offers us a choice on how we want to show up.

Me, I want to be authentic, mistakes and all.

How about you?

~

Editor: Brianna Bemel