I live in an extremely small space, with three other extremely messy people.

When I want to practice yoga at home I have only one option for spreading out my mat: Right smack in the middle of the living room, the room where we do all of our living.

This morning, while my daughters were down in the basement involved in a very dramatic Barbie scenario, I turned the TV on to the alternative music channel and rolled out the mat. Thirty minutes. Let’s shoot for thirty minutes today.

I got down on all fours to start with some cat-cows. I began making that connection between my breath and my movement, and getting into the flow.

Inhale my face up to cow. Ooh, the radiator needs to be dusted.

Exhale to cat and gaze down. What the hell is that under the couch?

Upward gaze, cow. Downward gaze, cat. A library book? A photo album? I think it’s a photo album. Where the hell did that come from?

Press back to child’s pose. I’m going to keep my eyes closed. I have to focus.

Sun breaths. Here we go. This will do it. Eyes closed, breathe and flow. That’s better.

Sun A’s. Two or three. Keep the eyes closed. Is that Bob Dylan?

Open the eyes to read the words on the TV screen. It is Bob Dylan. Is he considered alternative? Did I put on the wrong station?

Turn to the right. Prasarita padottanasana, wide-legged fold. Breathe and twist, and then I can turn around, and face away from the TV. That’s better.

Vinyasa. Sun B’s. Warrior I facing the dining room. Look at that room, so clean and neat. No distractions there. Nope, none at all.

High lunge. Right side prayer twist. That picture is crooked. I have to fix it later.

Vinyasa. Left side, lunge and twist. Don’t forget to feed the fish.

Down dog. Look back at the clock on the TV. It’s only been 15 minutes? Really?

Bend the knee, open the hip. Warrior 2, reverse, extended side angle, reverse, half moon, warrior 2, reverse, vinyasa. Here we go. Here we go. Now I’m in the zone.

Other side. Yes. This is it. We’re cooking now.

Rrrrrrrring! Telephone. Should I get it?

Down dog, look back to the caller ID on the TV screen. Oh, I have to get it to find out when they’re coming over.

Two minute phone conversation. Back to the mat. Down dog. I should go outside. There are too many distractions in here.

Step out onto the deck. Holy hell! It’s 105 degrees out here. Find some shade. A little patch of shade.

Sun B’s. Oh my Ganesh it is so friggin’ hot. I have to sit down.

Seated forward fold. My back is on fire.

Agnistambhasana. Hot. Hot. Sssso hhhot.

Baddhaa konasana. I can’t breathe.

Janu sirsana. Dying.

Half lord of the fishes. Oh, look a butterfly. It’s not a monarch. I think it’s a painted lady.

Reclining pigeon. I have to jump in the pool. Right. Now.

Lie down and twist. There are three beer bottle caps under the table. I could really go for a nice cold beer right now. Is it too early for a beer?

Full body stretch. I should have sun-screened.

Get ready for savasana.

“Mom! Mommy! Mooooommmm! We’re hungry! What’s for lunch?”

“Can you give me five minutes, please? I’m practicing! Don’t distract me!”

Maybe next time I will hide—The question remains if I can hide from my own thoughts though.

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{Photo: via Dave Hackbarth}

Asst. Ed: Leace Hughes/Ed: Sara Crolick