Ever notice that when we’re in a public place and we begin speaking to someone about sex, our voice begins to lower by a number of decimals and our body language leans inward so as not to allow anyone around us to hear what it is we’re talking about?

The reason for this is that we are conditioned with numerous tensions and fears regarding sex.

Tantra is a reminder that true relaxation begins with sex. However, as a society, we have been so conditioned that we have forgotten how to relax when it comes to anything involving sex—conversationally as well as in the physical act of sex.

Once we begin to relax during sexual intimacy, we begin to find that most of our anxieties and sorrows naturally subside. If we can relax into the energy that sex arises within, we will soon notice an inner comfort begin to radiate—ultimately giving the other areas of our lives the same quality of relaxation and loving ease.

Sexy Things to Think About:

• Sex should not be forced or struggled, but rather an ongoing means of communication.

• When we learn how to relax during sex through proper breathing and concentration, the energy that gets transmitted is life transforming. This shows us that sex can be directed to create more life, not simply another life.

• Genuine sexual ecstasy goes hand-in-hand with physical relaxation; this is contrary to the popular understanding of sex as effort, an activity involving tensions and pressures.

• Relaxation is the whole ambience of Tantra. When we relax into sex instead of building it up to a peak and then releasing it, the outcome will be more life energy and more love.

• Satisfying sex requires time. However, the unfortunate truth is that the more civilized our society has become, the less conscious we have become, ultimately creating an on-the-go, or “fast food” sexual experience. The problem with this is that we are not really here—the two partners are really not even together.

• We are not truly present in sex because we have gone in pursuit of a specific outcome. Tantra asks for an unhurried sexual approach. The goal in Tantra is to not think about a goal, a specific outcome or what time you need to get up for work the next day. Forget your daily obligations and simply be in the present moment, completely disregarding the concept of time altogether.

When we learn the essence of relaxing down into sex, we tap into the ancient secrets of Tantra. By incorporating these conscious techniques into your sex life as God and nature intended sex to be, we discover sex to be a healing spiritual force.

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