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“What I love most about her is the way she knows how to f*ck reality and make love to fantasy, not something many other humans know how to do. Imagination is her drink.” ~ Christopher Poindexter
This time I don’t want you to touch me—at least not yet.
We’ve spent hours, days and months exploring the hidden caverns of pleasure within our bodies—and though just one more time never seems like enough—this time I don’t want you to just f*ck my body.
This time I want you to f*ck my soul, ripe and open.
Shake my world and the dust lingering in the darkest corners.
Because this time I’m not only giving you the damn map—but the f*cking keys as well.
This time I want you to go deeper than you ever have before.
I know the way your lips feel against my breasts and stomach and though that memory is enough to send shivers down my spine—this time I want you to touch places your fingers haven’t caressed open yet.
It’s the places that I have had under lock and key—those sacred parts of myself that I have pretended were open, yet are still hidden behind the endless walls of a secret garden.
So, here I am—all of me, open and vulnerable and willing to let you in.
And though every day I wonder if I should shut that door for good—something keeps it open.
Because we both know there is no point in putting out a fire that is still burning so hot.
I don’t know if you plan on taking your time or if you will charge ahead with the determination of a warrior in battle—but this time you should know, I’m ready for you.
I’m ready to be shaken from all my safe places and to have my world rocked.
Let me get turned around until I become dizzy with the amphetamine of change.
Until the only place to gaze is into your eyes, as you try to grasp ahold of something that burns to the touch like the unrelenting wildfires of a summer haze.
This time I want you to shake my world, baby.
But, before you do that—I’m hoping you’ll take the time, the slow road to f*cking my soul into a million pieces of chaos that unfold like the violet of twilight.
Because I know whose hands I want on my body—and this time darlin’, it’s all about you.
Open me up, make my soul quiver for yours—bring me to the brink by seducing the fears from my body until the only thing left to do is take you inside of me.
Not your body—but your essence.
For this time, I have no desire to play it safe—although I’ve always enjoyed playing with fire too much, I never really worry about getting burned.
I don’t know what new truth the dawn will bring—but I do know that anything that has lasted this long deserves to be finished.
I’m not asking for sunshine days and the cool taste of perfectly smooth—for we are too wild to be tamed.
We long for a life that is filled with laughter and love—but we both know that our souls shake for the different, for the exotic—and it is that taste of the unquenchable that continually draws us to one another.
I can’t tell you that I won’t be scared, or that I won’t lash out in fear and try to run away—but this time you know my hiding places well enough.
And the difference is, this time, I want to be found.
I want to let you in, not just into my body, or my heart—but into my f*cking soul.
I want to feel what the ravaging of a thousand dreams would feel like against my breathing, quickening against yours.
I want to feel the world shake beneath us and quake with heartbeats that never seem to slow down.
While there are no guarantees—you’re the bet that I am willing to gamble.
Because even if I go down in flames and loose the only hand I ever wanted—at least I will know I played.
I won’t sit on the sidelines this time, letting life happen, and wait until the stars align perfectly.
And though we’ve done it a million different ways, in every wrong way possible.
We’ve never done this.
We’ve never come to each other with honesty and our imperfections, worn like medallions against our strong chests, broken from love gone wrong, yet filled with hope because we still believe love exists.
While we’ve both waited—sometimes it’s a tiring escapade for passionate souls to put off what we feel most drawn too.
Because even though there aren’t words to explain the whys of you and me, we owe it to ourselves to find the answers.
So, this time, I’m just asking, or maybe hoping that you will f*ck my soul right—into the place where the rest of the world disappears. Though the shadows rustle with questions, we will find the answers we need, in the spaces between your body and mine.
And just when it seems we won’t be able to take it one more minute—I hope you’ll shake and rattle my world until our previous life before becomes a distant, pale memory of subtleties and acquisitions, all preparing us for the this reality.
We could spend hours beneath flickering candle light debating the merits of the right time—the truth is no such thing exists.
Because life isn’t about waiting for the right moment—but choosing to make the moment right.
And the truth is, now is the perfect time to shake up the world, baby.
Because I’m ready—if you are.
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Relephant:
Author: Kate Rose
Editor: Ashleigh Hitchcock
Photo: flickr/lia_k
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