I have suffered with anxiety as long as I can remember.

That feeling of dread mixed with utter terror. A change in temperature, the weather, a commitment that should be the tiniest part of my week becomes all consuming.

While driving the other day, I was looking at the hills in the distance. I thought about how mountainous anxiety can feel, how it seems a never ending climb only to slip back so often, defeated. And then I thought—climb a hill instead. You’re still climbing, but it’s not so steep, you can choose to take a rest and take in the view instead of constantly looking up at how much further you have to go.

Then this happened. This little poem, seemingly inconsequential at the time, has become my mantra. Read it, feel it and give yourself permission.

The Mountain isn’t going anywhere, you can climb it when you are ready:

If the mountain seems too big today

then climb a hill instead

if the morning brings you sadness

it’s ok to stay in bed

if the day ahead weighs heavy

and your plans feel like a curse

there’s no shame in rearranging

don’t make yourself feel worse

if a shower stings like needles

and a bath feels like you’ll drown

if you haven’t washed your hair for days

don’t throw away your crown

a day is not a lifetime

a rest is not defeat

don’t think of it as failure

just a quiet, kind retreat

it’s ok to take a moment

from an anxious, fractured mind

the world will not stop turning 

while you get realigned

the mountain will still be there

when you want to try again

you can climb it in your own time

just love yourself til then.

– Laura Ding-Edwards –

link – facebook.com/rainbirdroots