MFT

Male sexuality frightens people. It also turns them on.

Male sexuality frightens people. It also turns them on.

Sitting in circle with mxn sharing their relationship with sexuality and prior sexual experiences reveals a truth.

Mxn is an inclusive term for male sexual orientation, gender role expression, racial background, ancestral lineage, and spiritual paths.

Lust, confusion, love, aggression, fulfillment, shame, joy, and regret all fills the void. All present for mxn in the bedroom, the backseat of our prius, on our laptops when we’re alone, and in our darting eyes while moving through whole foods for dinner. And then blink, it disappears and we’re back to just purchasing a sandwich.

A hidden empire of male sexual liberty and enslavement is hidden right now behind your browser on pornhub.com. A universe where mxn congregate to please ourselves, endlessly, and forever. Where morality gets blurred in an anti-pc fiesta. Where feminism is virtually unknown, and nobody notices if black lives matter, but where black dicks definitely do.

Trump supporter, click. Church goer, click. Urban healer, click. Your brother, click. father, click. partner, click. son, click. you, click?

A dark man cave filled with virtual moans. Yet, it’s in this therapeutic realm of anonymity where our innermost desires are accepted with the warmth of a mother. Beyond sex, it’s a validation of our libidinal drivers that’s reasonably quarantined at work, with our boys, our lovers, and elsewhere in society. Places where civility is rightly mandated. But in the dark, our wildest roam free.

From what I’ve now witnessed… the secrecy, not the desire, is the toxic masculinity. The grab, not the thought, is the toxic masculinity. Mxn continue to need safe spaces to consciously explore and verbally express our sexual desires, questions, and fears, in ways that are open and in the light.

A cultural shift for mxn to discuss our sexuality with one another in an informed and caring way — rather than a jocular one, may also contribute to curing some forms of toxic masculinity, rape culture, and sexual assault. Cause right now, many of us are disconnected from each other in this supportive way, and pornhub is killing it. click.

Jewel Love, MFT
www.jewellovetherapy.com / www.theurbanhealers.com

To clarify a couple questions I’ve received.. This article isn’t porn shaming — or promoting. It’s highlighting how porn uniquely welcomes in our sexual desires in ways public society wrestles with. Realizing this trait and lack of male communication directly with one another on the topic, I’ve tried highlighting the importance of this conversation among mxn. The social validation, information, and accountability from this act could be affirming.

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