Some people believe that everyone has a single soul mate whose pieces match your own, and once they come into your life, you hear the angels singing, everything changes, and you are suddenly whole again. The two of you ride off into the sunset and life is great.

That sounds like a lot of unrealistic, hollow bullshit to me.

A soul mate is not the person who makes life great. A soul mate is a person you are meant to encounter at least once in your life who will test you to your limit, bring you to your knees, hold up a mirror, and force you into being accountable.

This person will bring up every one of your unresolved issues and past traumas, dig deep into your molten core until you’re exposed, and force you to reflect internally at every speck of magma you find inside, looking for your true self.

If you think finding your soul mate will make you happy, think again. It should be the most humbling experience you ever have. And when it’s all over and you are finally at peace with yourself, your soul mate might even go quietly into the night.

What’s more realistic is the concept of a soul tribe. A group of people who get each other and feel immediately comfortable around one another, even if they’re strangers. People who have each other’s backs, come what may.

Your soul tribe usually consists of people broken in similar ways to you. They listen to understand not answer. They empathize with your troubles on a molecular level. They are your people and will stand beside you when the times are tough.

The idea of a soul tribe opens you up to so much more from the world instead of just one perfect person. Love, kindness, understanding, and most importantly, having people you can truly count on while traversing this experience called Life.

If I had to choose between them, I know what I would pick. But thankfully, it isn’t a choice. We all get to experience both.