Before coming together with your beloved intimate partner, consider taking an extra moment to feel into your depths and get more centered. Feel your role in the relationship. This is a way to consciously connect with yourself in preparation for loving another. I created a ‘Pre-flight Checklist’ for my personal use that you might find value in.

Pre-flight Checklist

1) Body

• Well-rested
• Soft and relaxed belly
• Remember that truth lives in the body (not just the head)

• 2) Source
• Realize that the source of supply is within
• Feel my ‘enough-ness’

3) Stillness and Clarity

• Pause to gather energy and reflect on priorities. What are my desires?
• Brief solo meditation
• Feel my inner stability

4) Energy

• Know what I am bringing – have a plan
• Feel my energy. What action is congruent from this place?
• Check the careful, nice guy (guise) at the door
• Think: light adventure, smile and breathe into open-heartedness

5) Voice

• Speak truth to myself on the inside
• Go deep at transitions by speaking to what’s important in those moments
• When feeling ‘triggered’, feel into the truth of your soul

7) Light Heart

• Keep humor and perspective – laugh together
• Keep a sense of the union as sacrament

8) Appreciation

• Give insightful compliments
• Feel my impact upon this other person
• Re-orient to love. Speak to what our love means (without getting heavy about it)
• Touch her (praise and touch is food)

9) Willingness and Generosity

• Check in (ask for an emotional weather report from time to time)
• Consider this other as the most important person in the room

• Give love directly when they’re upset! (It’s not about pleasing, rather about opening to love together)