The phone rings” Renee It is God; he wants you to sing more”

Over thirty-some years ago I was a young teenage woman working at a summer camp.

I had graduated my final year of high school at boarding school, and I was uncertain of my future. All I knew was the following: I had a  yearning and a desire to become a missionary and I wanted to sing and write my heart out. Did I forget the part about being a missionary? I don’t think that I ever shared this with anyone. That summer I had a different calling. I fell in love. I am not sure when it happened and looking back, I think it might have been that rainy day when the phone rang and my soon-to-be love announced that God was calling, God has never stopped calling and my relationship with God has blossomed.  Yes, it has grown even though there have been times when I had” God” in the doghouse.

When life happened fast, and I was served a healthy dose of loss I fell victim to regret. The dark shadows of the corridors of a room in which I prayed became hallowed and holy, I cried out to God, and I know that I was heard.

Most of the articles on here are Buddhist and well let’s face it “God” is rarely mentioned in secular magazines. I offer this because I am a Buddhist and a Christian, a Jew and a Muslim and every religion in between. God is real at least the God I have come to know and love. God is in you and me. Religion is a construct and there are many ways or paths to reach and find God. When we look at each and see and feel the love God is here with us.

Here I go again getting all juiced up talking about God. I didn’t become a missionary I became a social worker and God has never left my side. The God I am talking about is a forgiving, kind and compassionate friend who is always nearby.

Wow, I just counted how many times I used the word God, and this isn’t even about God it is about learning how to pick up the pieces. How does God tie into picking up the pieces? Often it is during the difficult times in our life that we reach out for spiritual guidance and connection.  It is during such times that we feel like we have lost our way or are losing the ground beneath our feet. During these times we reach out yearning for divine intervention. It is when we feel broken and scattered and in a million pieces that we in our humanness come completely undone. Perhaps this is when we live fully and completely beyond our ego state. In this state when we might feel like we are at our lowest we are rich and pure and ready to let God in.

Picking up the pieces is therefore perhaps more a state of being and very much a place we find ourselves. We know we are not broken and yet we have faltered and fallen. It is in acceptance that we are able to bear witness to our fragility and human wounds. Humans are incredibly resilient.

Tonight, as I type the last words, I realize that night has fallen.  As I crawl into bed, I offer a prayer and a song.