Our master bedroom used to be a lair, a haven, a place to invoke magic.

It had things like night stands, fancy bedding and throw pillows. It was taken to for long Sunday naps, reading epic novels and nooners. A sanctuary—clean, organized and uncluttered, it offered solace to even the weariest of residents.

Over the years, with the arrival of two small children, our master bedroom has taken on new personality. Well meaning, we tried to work with bedroom in order to hold onto its original title of private domain, however, as more family members took up stock in the household, the regality of its nature became obsolete.

As a result, I have compiled a list (and perhaps a reminder to my tired self) of 10 Allowables for the (new) Bedroom:

10. Terrified dreamers: Feel free to come blazing in at 3am, screaming as loud as possible and diving into the covers head first. Only safety resides here. Ghouls and monsters do not live under this bed, though you may find the occasional dust bunny.

9.  Pillow Sharers: It is obvious now that pillows are made for multiple sleepers—two (or three!) heads are better than one.

8. Arm and Limb Drapers: By all means drape away. Preferably, across faces, over chests, knees in stomachs—we love touch!

7. Insomniacs by Approximation: I am not sure the last time I slept through the night uninterrupted. I believe it was the month my husband decided to “Keep the children in their rooms!” by sleeping on a backpacking pad on the floor in the hallway.

6. Animal Kingdom: As long as it’s domesticated it can stay and sleep and snore.

5.  Children’s Books, Tarot Cards, Novels and Magazines: No need to organize—the nightstand will be found eventually under the piles.

4. Laundry: No lair would be complete without various stages of clean, dirty, folded, tossed, discarded laundry lying around.

3. Daily Inspirations: Examples include but are not limited to: “Abandon all hope of fruition” (Lojong Slogan) and “Regard the arrival of chaos as very good news” (Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche).

2. To Do Lists: Also found on the bed side table these are frantically sketched out for the next day when woken with a start at 2am because you have forgotten to pack a lunch, phone a friend or go grocery shopping.

And finally,

1.  Love, Grace, and Laughter: Bring on the memories and the tears and the snores and the giggles, the hopes and the dreams and the whispers and secrets. Because at the end of the day what else do we have? (A night slept through notwithstanding).

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 Ed: Bryonie Wise