My lover said to me recently, “It’s like all the parts of me reported back and said, ‘She’s really spacious. There might be room for all of us in here!’ ”

What this speaks to is that—quite simply—there hasn’t been room for all of who we are for most of our lives.

So, on behalf of everyone, I declare: Welcome to the Normal Room.

This doesn’t mean that you have to be “normal,” or that anyone in this room is normal. Quite the opposite. What it means is that you get to be yourself—you get to be your authentic, “normal,” whole self in this room. Here. With me.

And with all the other normal, “themselves” people out there.

I almost want to apologize for the last 10 centuries for how limited this invitation has been. (I’m sorry). You deserve a room where you can be you. You deserve a whole wide world where you can just totally be yourself, without even the hint or concern of ridicule, judgment, stigma or lack of support.

The truth is that most of us haven’t figured out how to step aside and allow that for you—to allow all of you to just be here.

(I am so sorry.)

Come and be you here! Notice the others who are in the Normal Room too— you’ll see them in the store, on the street, in the car next to you.

Only yesterday I pulled up quickly in rush hour, accidentally blocking a car from taking his left. I turned and acknowledged him, showing non-verbally my apology for having obstructed his left-taking. He smiled, making eye contact and gave me a thumbs-up.

In that moment, although we didn’t know each other and would likely never see each other again, we were in the Normal Room together.

Notice your beloved’s or your child’s unique “normal” that they haven’t figured out how to hide yet (bless them!).

And then go forth and be your crazy, particular, normal self. Don’t hide your accent. Show your cleavage. Say “hi” when you are moved to. Dance your ass off. Yell when you are mad. Ask questions if you don’t understand.

Be curious and wide-eyed when things are new.

Tell people that you want to play with them.

Welcome to the Normal Room.

Relephant: 

Love Your Kids. Leave Them Alone: The Art of Radical Parenting.

Author: Kristin Luce 

Editor: Renée Picard

Photo: demibrooke at Flickr