She won’t ask for it, nor will she tell you how it’s done.

But, deep inside her, where your heart is taking refuge, she hopes to be loved in a particular way.

Before you love her, make sure you’ve loved yourself enough first—as the first thing she will notice in you is not the brand of clothes you are wearing, but the intensity of love that you have toward yourself. She wants to be sure that you’re loving her out of choice and not out of needing.

She is not the type of person who is seeking a half. That said, don’t expect to complete her because she will not be completing you. Your completeness is what will sweep her off her feet.

Share your completeness with her, your aspirations, your fears and your utmost profound thoughts, like she will do with you. Listen to them and breathe them in. She doesn’t want you to understand them—she just wants you to listen.

Love her gently. Don’t force her to give everything at once, or to dive headfirst into your soul. She won’t open herself up because she’s scared. You have to understand that she had a rather painful past that triggered her to build a wall around her so she feels safer.

Slowly tear down that wall and build a solid bridge that connects your soul to hers. She wants to be loved fiercly, with certainty and stability. Let her watch you as you support the foundations of that bridge so she can walk on it fearlessly and courageously.

Love her with actions—they are the only words she will listen to. Don’t wait for a reason to kiss her, to lay your hands on her skin, or to run your fingers through her hair. Make love to her soul the same way you’d make love to her body.

Penetrate her thoughts and explore the depth of her perspectives. Give her endless intellectual orgasms and agree to disagree.

She doesn’t want you to agree with her all the time or bring to the surface what’s only in common with her. Don’t be scared to show your differences as she will show you hers. Know that she wants to be challenged in all areas because she’s up to it.

She wants to be loved with simplicity.

She doesn’t want to be taken out on fancy dinners or go on expensive trips. Seeing the Eiffel tower is the least of her concerns—and Venice isn’t even on her bucket list.

Love her with a sense of wilderness, because it is exactly what she is made of.

Gaze at the stars with her, go on road trips with her, put your mattress in the middle of nowhere and laugh until it hurts. Read books for her and bath with her.

Love her the way she is. Love her when she’s angry or grumpy. When she’s happy or funny. Love her when she makes a complete fool out of herself and don’t even try to change her. She simply wants to see sparkles in your eyes when you look at her, even at her worst.

Love her with forgiveness, patience and understanding. Be the back she can lean on when she doesn’t feel good enough. Be her safety and the shelter she can hide in when she doesn’t feel home.

She is a lighthouse that will cast its light on your way so you won’t ever get lost.

She sees everything and doesn’t forget anything. Therefore, know that every inch of love you shall give, will comeback to you with greater intensity.

If you let her drink from your well, she will take your hand and lead you to her ocean.

And never fail to remember that just like you chose her, she chose you, too.

~

Author: Elyane Youssef

Image: Flickr/Prayitno Photography // Unsplash

Editors: Caitlin Oriel; Renee Picard