Sometimes, it feels like I don’t know what I want.

Sometimes, it’s easier to pretend to not know or let someone else be in control of that.

Sometimes, I prefer to “go with the flow” and see where that takes me…

Desire is a beautifully loaded word. Have you considered what it means to you? Have you ever thought of how this word affects every decision you make in your life?

Most of us have lost touch with this wonderful word.

Desire.

Desire is the energetic bread to the butter of life, yet it seems to not get the respect it deserves.

So, What do you want? Are you annoyed by that question? Have you heard me ask you this before?

Sadly, many of us have lost touch with this innate knowledge. We don’t know what we want—or at least we think we don’t.

I’m not only pointing to others when I share this; I’m including myself in this discussion.

Sometimes, it feels like I don’t know what I want. Sometimes, it’s easier to pretend to not know or let someone else be in control of that. Sometimes, I prefer to “go with the flow” and see where that takes me.

But if I get honest with myself, I know what I want—most of the time.

What gets in the way of me asking or doing what I want 100 percent of the time?

Other desires. Mainly, my desire to not look like an asshole.

I don’t want to look bad. I don’t want to hurt your feelings. I don’t want you to think I’m selfish.

Can you see the predicament I’m in? Can you see the predicament you’re probably in?

Desire doesn’t just involve getting what you want, it also involves saying no. Desire involves risking yourself and having others see you as an asshole.

I find saying yes to my desires is one of the most vulnerable and courageous things I can do.

What if I don’t get what I want? What if I hurt someones feelings? What if they never want to talk to me again? What if they think I’m selfish?

Don’t even get me started on this “selfish” thing.

For now, I want you to consider what you want. (Note: What you want includes what you think you deserve, what you think you don’t deserve, what is a “no” for you, a “yes” for you, “maybes” and “I don’t knows.”)

Did you just commit to a birthday party that you’d rather not attend?

Did you just tell someone that you’d do something for them, but only out of guilt?

Did you just turn down a trip to Mexico because you’re “supposed to” put that money into your 401k or Roth IRA?

Did you just order a salad when all you really wanted was that juicy ass burger on the gluten-filled bun?

Whatever your desire is, I’m granting you permission.

So, what do you want?

Tell me in the comments below.

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Author: Joshua Barad

Image: Tom Sodoge/Unsplash

Editors: Toby Israel; Renée Picard

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