Self-pleasuring is still a taboo subject for many women and some have no idea the magic that is literally available at their fingertips.

Sexual pleasure has countless benefits, yet many women surrender their pleasure to their partner rather than taking it into their own hands.

Rather than waiting for a partner to pleasure you, my bold suggestion to you is that you go f*ck yourself!

If you’ve not done it before, you will probably find yourself pretty uncomfortable when you board the self-pleasure train.

For many of us, sexual pleasure, as a whole, has been tainted with shame—and masturbation is the darkest secret. From the time we touch ourselves as curious children, and get slapped on the hand by the adults in our lives, we learn that touching ourselves is wrong. We learn that we shouldn’t do it and if we do, we should feel bad about it.

That’s absolutely not true. We are made for pleasure—in fact, the woman’s clitoris has over 8,000 nerve endings and it’s sole purpose is to give us pleasure. Not using that amazing clitoris for its intended purpose is like hiding a Van Gogh behind a sheet.

You can choose different ways to self-pleasure and can include toys, but toys are not required. If you decide to integrate toys, I recommend visiting a store so you can see the variety available and can select something that is suitable for you.

Be prepared: The maiden voyage of a woman into the forbidden territory of sex shops can be wrought with embarrassment. If you’ve never been into a sex store before, gather some girlfriends who have and go together.

Keep in mind that the people in the store are not judging you, and they will happily answer any questions you might have. If your friends are experienced, they can help you choose something that will work for you.

F*cking yourself has a number of benefits that should be considered. The first is that as you masturbate, you learn what your body likes and you uncover the keys to your own pleasure. Doing so will help you guide your partner—if you have one—and will assist you in ensuring your own pleasure in sexual encounters.

Additionally, self-pleasuring has the benefit of helping improve your relationship with your body. You learn what amazing things your body can do, and you become comfortable with areas of your body you may have previously ignored. As you begin to understand the holy grail that is your body, your level of self-love and appreciation will increase.

When a woman orgasms, she experiences a heady combination of chemical release that creates a natural high, and causes her to feel relaxed, comfortable, and happy. During your menstrual cycle the pain of cramps can be relieved by orgasm.

Orgasms help you sleep better, hence the post-coital snooze-fest you may have had after an extended romp. Studies also show that when a woman orgasms, the amygdala (the part of the brain known for fear and anxiety) is relatively inactive.

The physical benefits alone could be motivation enough, but there are even more benefits to f*cking yourself.

Spiritually speaking, sexual feeling and orgasm is one of the best ways to raise your energy vibration. There are many who practice sex magic, which is the practice of creating a powerful intention and remaining focused on that intention while masturbating. The energy and power created during orgasm infuses the intention with incredible power, thus making the intention more powerful.

Finally, f*cking yourself is a great way to avoid suppressing your natural human desires. If you are celibate or not in a relationship, the desire for sexual release still remains and giving yourself the gift of pleasure can prevent you from engaging in high risk or impulsive sexual behaviors. When you know how to self-pleasure, you take away the need for someone else to do it for you.

I believe one of the best ways for a woman to become a liberated, confident, sensual goddess is to regularly self-pleasure. There is no shame and it is one of the few things in life that has virtually no negative side effects.

So—what are you waiting for?

Go f*ck yourself.

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Author: Lisa Vallejos

Image: Flickr

Editor: Lieselle Davidson