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A post shared by Elephant Journal (@elephantjournal) on Apr 28, 2019 at 11:00am PDT

It’s the 21st century, and most folks still believe women aren’t built for casual sex.

I’ve found that this is an idea that permeates through every type of demographic—liberal or conservative, male or female, rich or poor.

While certainly not all women are inclined to have casual sex, I tend to challenge the idea that we’re only biologically programmed for rom-com-style, wildly committed sex.

This notion can also result in a great deal of shaming, as women who do enjoy casual sex are often judged or assumed to have “daddy issues,” be filling an emotional hole, or seeking attention.

Terri Conley is a social psychologist and professor of psychology at University of Michigan. Her primary research focuses are gender, sexuality, and monogamy (or lack thereof). She too challenges the notion that men are built for casual sex and women are not.

Her TED Talk explores this concept, and also busts two other common myths about sex and sexuality: