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August 12, 2019

Hug It Out

Your skin is your body’s largest organ – it regenerates at an amazing rate – you sport a new coat of it every month. Skin acts as our body’s defense against the external world, as well as our brain’s collector of external data.

A hug provides complex responses that warm our heart and make us feel better. Hugging is joyful physical experience.

Sadly, our culture says our bodies have to be beautiful and we also sexualize everything so unfortunately touch becomes complicated.

Touch is supposed to be uncomplicated.

After being accused of sexual assault in 2009 I became frightened of touch, relationships and closeness, particularly with women.

I was a man who knew how to be efficient and quick. I knew how to teach. I knew how to lead.

But then spending time in an orphanage in Guatemala it was the realization that what they were crying out for most was touch, but also, maybe that’s what I was crying out for — a safe touch.

According to Dr. Gary Chapman in his book, “The Five Love Languages” physical touch isn’t all about the bedroom. Physical touch fosters a sense of security and belonging in any relationship.

A touch which gives security and reveals. The way one can put one’s arm around the shoulder of some. It’s not to possess them. It’s not to hold on to them. It’s to reveal a tenderness

It is the realization of how we need to create a culture which is no longer a culture just of competition but a culture of welcoming, where tenderness and touch is important, and it’s neither sexualized nor aggressive. It is human.

Skin contact is essential for our overall well-being. Our bodies are made to provide and respond to physical comfort, so next time you see someone in pain or feel as if the world is crumbling around you, open yourself to a hug.

Touch is about what it means to be human, to relate and to celebrate life together.

The healing process begins with a touch and embrace. It’s just that simple.

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