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December 11, 2019

Can anyone hear me?

 

Did you ever feel not heard? Have you ever sent a message to someone and they did not answer? Or it took the hours or days to respond? When people tell you they agree with you only to find out that their actions do not show it. Feeling as if people are ignoring you?  When you have a conversation with someone and for some reason they always go back to talking about themselves. Or when you express your feelings over and over but the other person still violates your boundaries. Why do we do this? Why do we keep trying to make a point? Are we trying to validate ourselves? Or our self worth? Looking for outside validation from others?  Trying so hard and giving away our personal power to situations that are not healthy.

So recently I had a death in my family. And it has just brought out some wounds to the surface again that I thought I dealt with. It just honestly brought up a huge Stir of emotions. So I went to counseling today and just basically unloaded everything I was feelIng. She looked at me and said you feel like your not being heard? I looked at her and I said that is exactly it. And when I went home to really meditate on why do I feel this way. I thought about what I was saying. I feel like I’m not being heard. Well there is my answer. I’m not listening to myself. So the Universe is going to throw back at me what I am doing until I rectify the situation.

The more I don’t listen to myself I am  going to attract people that won’t listen to me and situations similar to what I am doing. It also made me realize I still have more healing to do and I’m fine with that. I feel life is one big healing journey. We are constantly learning and evolving  I was becoming in patient with the Universe in the past. Constantly telling the Universe when will it be time to date again? Because I stopped dating two years ago after I was attacked. When will it be time to meet my soul tribe? When will I make new friends? When will I meet people like me? When I say like me I would like to fine spiritual people trying to evolve and live a healthy lifestyle.  From what I am finding it is all about Divine Timing and being patient with ourselves.

When I have tried recently to date again I only attracted unavailable men. The good news is I am realizing right away the difference between a toxic person or an emotionally unavailable person. I also can spot narcissistic people right away.  Also  part of being patient with myself is to stop and really congratulate myself on how far I have come on this journey. We all should take the time to do little self love techniques every day. Make time for that counselor. Go to that group therapy session. Eat something healthy, get outdoors and exercise! Say kind words to yourself. As well as to say kind words to and about others. If you can’t find a nice word to say to another person don’t say anything. Our minds do not know the difference of when we complain of others or talk down to ourselves. Our subconscious thinks we are talking down to ourselves. Really try to observe your your words and feelings.

Speak your truth! Put up those boundaries! Go to that yoga class! Buy that new book that came out! Spend time with love ones and that includes your pets! But also take that time alone to just rest your mind and not have to speak to anyone. Enjoying quiet time alone is a good way to listen to your inner self. If we are constantly around others how can we ever think for ourselves? Tell people that are close to you that you love them because tommorrow is never guaranteed!

Doing something kind for yourself can be anything that you love to do! It feels great to do things you love’ We all deserve to feel great! With the holiday season ahead of us it easy to forgot about ourselves because we are busy thinking of others. Guess what, don’t go broke to show others you love them! That is not what Christmas is about! It’s really about spending time with the people you love! Just show people you care and spend time with them. Do what you can for presents but just remember your loved ones are not expecting you to not pay your rent so you can get them gifts.  Give yourself a break, you deserve it! I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas, happy Holidays or what ever you celebrate I hope you all are safe and happy!

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