Naomi Wolf, an American liberal progressive feminist author, journalist, and former political advisor – released ‘Outrages: Sex, Censorship and the Criminalization of Love’ last year but she made a number of basic historical errors in writing her book as pointed out during a BBC interview by Matthew Sweet.

She, like many people, read into the past worse things than actually happened to highlight how terrible and draconian a story was.  In her book one example used was a man who was charged for sodomy and was sentenced to death by execution.

In the day sodomy was a term used to describe a range of activities and one of those was having sex with minors. The actual facts of the story Wolf was referring to was an individual who was 17 years old who had sex with a six-year-old – and that is what he was charged for. Wolf’s claim in the book was that the individual was executed for being gay.

Also, death recorded doesn’t actually mean the person was killed – death recorded means that a sentence of death was recorded as that is what the crime demanded but not necessarily carried out.

In a culture that devalues men to begin with and then completely ostracizes any man connected with any form of sexual misconduct – others perceptions become the loud majority and impact the ability to even function in society. While the silent supporters may cheer on from the sidelines – they are more concerned about their own brand being tarnished by being associated with a man of questionable moral standing.

In the teachings of Judaism, one finds the following anecdote: “If there are ten people, one will be someone who criticizes you no matter what you do.   This person will come to dislike you, and you will not learn to like them either. Then, there will be two others who accept everything about you and whom you accept too, and you will become close friends with them. The remaining seven people will be neither of these types.”

Do you focus on the person who dislikes you? Do you pay more attention to the two who love you? or would you focus on the crowd, the other seven? A person who is lacking in harmony of life will see only the one person he dislikes and will make a judgement of the world from that.

Does one accept oneself on the level of acts, or on the level of being? This is truly a question that relates to the courage to be joyful in the face of adversity.

Many are only able to recognize their own worth only on the level of acts. They choose to work long hours, bringing in enough money to support a family and are recognized by society – and, on that basis, view themselves as having a greater worth.  For each and every one of us, however, there comes a time when one can no longer serve as the provider.  On such occasions, those who can accept themselves only on the level of acts are severely damaged as their lives lack harmony.

No matter what moments you are living, or if there are people who dislike you, as long as you do not lose sight of the guiding star of “I contribute to others” you will not lose your way, and you can do whatever you like.  Whether you are disliked or not, you pay it no mind and live free. Dance in the earnest moments of the here and now.  Do not look at the past, and do not look at the future.  Live each complete moment. There is no need to compete with anyone, and one has no use for destinations.

When I look back on my life up to now, no matter how hard I try, I will never arrive at a satisfactory explanation as to why I am here. My story carries so many broken dreams, hurts, disappointments and all the things I do not understand. Life has thrown me many curves and it hasn’t been fair but today I am at peace.

In many religious traditions, God is called the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end.  We get excited about the beginning, but we don’t hear a lot about the end. Everything that starts must finish but this is hard for us as it feels like a setback.

The real growth is how we handle the closed doors, the disappointments, and the people that treated you wrong because one day the ashes will turn into beauty and the mourning into dancing.

It is impossible to find the strength to move forward if you are angry over what is behind as one of the most difficult journeys humans face is finding peace with the past.

I would love nothing more than for others to stop judging me based on what one person said I did 11 years ago but I have come to accept that they may never quit judging me.  It has been recommended to be that maybe they are jealous of my strength and the blessings in my life as most people don’t talk about average people or those not doing anything.  I have been told that people talk about exceptional people that are taking new ground, making a difference and standing out.

As I have learned no matter where you go there will be opposition, critics, and sharks trying to pull you down.

You have very little control over your destiny –  you are not going understand everything that happens. People may walk away from you, life will not turn out the way you thought. It is easy to get bitter, hold a grudge, and lose your passion but sometimes to save yourself you have to let go. Trust the divine with your successes, your failures, the betrayals and everything that does not make sense.

Stay in faith and believe something better is coming.