We “show up” for each other during the hard times of life.

My 3 year old grandson, Bjorn has been fighting cancer for 2 years. My daughter, Abigail is right there when Bjorn vomits for the 20th time in 2 hours, when he’s awake at 1 am, and 3 am, and 5 am. She holds his retching body, steadies it, cries with him as he screams, “no, I don’t want to.” “I know Honey; I know you don’t.” she comforts.  She miraculously finds the very last clean towel as the 4th and 5th load of the day is still washing and drying. Bjorn’s daddy, Casey is there to administer meds, talking calmly, looking Bjorn right in his eyes with gentle words of reassurance. He’s there putting up a swing in the living room because his son can’t play outside. These two who have barely a minute alone anymore, show up for each other with small thoughtful gifts, a tender touch, a kind word, a well timed joke.

People show up.

My former boss, Heather had my driveway plowed during a giant snowfall last month when my 63 year old back went out from shoveling. My Facebook friend Joelle, who’d I’d yet to meet, showed up in my backyard last year when I was desperate, and ready to give up. She saved me, gave me things I needed, hugs and hope. My once estranged brother, David gifted me with the only vacation I’ve ever had. My current boss drove me all over town to car shop and picked me up for work too. My friend Rob gave me a car to drive for the next week. He and his brother test drove the car I wanted to buy. Some people are constant heroes.

We show up for others over big things, but the little things matter too: 25 years ago my arthritic mother walked 6 blocks to my house to wash my dishes because I couldn’t face the sink that day. Showing up can be in absurd situations and in odd sacrificial ways: my friend Jane drove me home from the hospital and when I felt nauseous she dumped her purse in the seat and told me I could throw up in it.

Sometimes we show up because we have extra when someone else has nothing. Sometimes we see a service or help we can offer and so, we show up. Sometimes we’re just there, because someone can’t face the day.

We show up.

In a world that seems crueler and more brutal each day, we show up.

It doesn’t have to be the same cause: cancer, transport, despair, need… but it’s often the same reasons; we care, we love, others matter to us. We see a need and believe we can fill it. We understand that everyone is weak sometimes, and if we can be the strong help, that’s what we are compelled to do.

Some days I just “show up” by smiling at someone, thanking a cashier for being kind, or letting someone into the traffic lane. There’s lots of ways, to be there for someone.

I’ve never forgotten how others have shown up for me. Have you?