Upside to the Shutdown: aka, 7.5 ways to a better you.

It’s been almost three weeks since I sat down with anyone other than my wife, and I must say, some sh*t is definitely an improvement.

For example:

1. Everyone is in the mood and has the time and attention for a real check-in. I’m talking about meaningful video chats and calls where you see smiles and laughs and technically inept people connecting, not just messages and social media. Haven’t had this much community connection since…9/11.
2. My FOMO has been replaced my Ommmmm. Not that I am actually meditating daily, but damn I am way calmer and more present knowing that I am obligated to be here now, and stay here now for the foreseeable in my ShantiShack.
3. The internet is no longer powered by cats. Instead, by humans behaving like the trapped, bored, vulnerable, domesticated animals we are currently. Shouldn’t this prompt everyone to free their indentured slave pets later? (Hate me? Don’t care.)
4. We are loving in relative SloMotion. Besides needing to clean the house three times as often, there is so much less to do. Father Time has eased off the gas. This feels like a more civilized pace of life. Is this how people used to live way back before the internet? Reminder: reset my time machine to the ’70s.
5. This is good practice for the climate crisis. We may not all be staying at home when states are dividing the climate refugees from Florida, but for sure it’s a good trial balloon to see how we all pull together for a common good when a bunch of vulnerable peeps with the dumbest laws in the country need help.
6. Despite the decree on page seven of the Being an American handbook that states that we are a consumer-driven economy, many of us are recognizing that we are doing just fine with less. Note: Please spend wildly once we can locally—just to help the small businesses keep us all from having an Amazon chip inserted under our skin for a little longer.
7. Hey, look, life with less driving and more walking is so…European, and civilized, and maybe being around for 1,000 years longer than the United States has taught them smart lessons around human logistics? Or at least to look cooler if you can’t hide in your car.
8. No, 7.5: Now don’t get me wrong, I miss my coffee shop so much I cried a little after day three, but then I thought, hmmm…if I make some serious biscotti, and use the mugs I accidentally borrowed from said coffee shop, this setup could suffice. And besides, that no shirt, shoes, service poster business is a lie—you need pants too, and at home it’s a German summer vacation island all day.