When you follow your dreams, personal growth is inevitable. At some point, you leave old structures, like a job that gives you a schedule that you build your life around, and you start interacting with your world and your inner world in a deeper way. Our experience of “shelter-in-place” is creating these same opportunities.

The first thing you may have noticed at this time is feeling like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster. Some days you may feel great, other days you may feel afraid, angry, or frustrated. It might feel hard to “stay positive” or be grateful. Some of it might have to do with Covid-19, some of it (a lot of it) might have to do with the fact that you’ve been taken out of the habits and life structures that have kept you so busy the stuff inside hasn’t come bubbling up. Now there’s space for unresolved feelings of anger, stuff from an old break up, pain from the loss of a loved one, the fear of loneliness, or other emotions that you may not know the source of, to come creeping up, ready to be processed. This is your first call to change, and that change is starting to sit with your feelings.

Part of sitting with your feelings, whether you feel anger, jealousy, fear, or happiness, is learning that emotions are neither good nor bad. Being in a position where you are forced to sit with or face yourself, like shelter-in-place, self-employment, making your next art piece, brainstorming a new product, or whatever your dreams look like, you have to be able to address what you feel without judgment. You come to know that when you feel unpleasant feelings that nothing is wrong, nothing bad is happening, and you’ll know to cry it out, scream it out, write it out, or just take a break. You learn to create the safety you need to be able to sit with and process your emotions and honor them. These experiences may even feel overwhelming at first, things may feel overwhelming right now, and that’s why it’s essential to commit to self-compassion instead of self-judgment, to accept, honor, sit with, process, and learn from your feelings. 

As a variety of emotions come up during this time, feel them. Take a deep breath, tell yourself it’s okay to feel what you’re feeling and then follow whatever sense you get to resolve it. You may just sit with the feeling that’s come up as you allow it to dissipate and pass. You might ask yourself or the feeling why you’re feeling that way, and then use that answer to process and release it. You might decide to shout, cry, or write. Following what you feel will help you honor, release, and truly move on from whatever is coming up; whether it’s something from the past, fears of the future, or something from your life right now. This creates freedom to continue moving forward with your dreams and fulfill your purpose with more clarity, confidence, and inner peace.

Another big topic during all of this has been productivity. I’m sure you’ve had an email or two or ten, or have seen posts on Instagram that say, “Now is the best time to change your life and x, y, z!” Is now a good time to do the things you’ve always wanted to do? Start that business? Write that book? Declutter your home? Yes, it’s an amazing time to do all of those things. I’m personally encouraging everyone to start their businesses and pursue their passions right now, but I’ll also be the first to tell you that if you want or need to rest to just lay down. (You know, like we just talked about, honoring how you feel and what you need.) 

When you begin to follow your dreams, you must learn when to rest, and that includes honoring when you feel tired. It’s taking a nap instead of drinking more coffee. It’s stopping work with enough time to unwind before bed, and making sure you take care of things like eating an actual dinner and making time to spend with those you care about. Do you have a lot of extra time right now? Yes. You know what you might need most before transitioning into a big, new project, especially depending on the type of life you were living before now? Some flippin’ rest. Sleep, watch Netflix, take care of your current need for chill. 

Last summer, my wife and I experienced intense burnout. We’d started producing and filming a feature film the previous fall, and our crew for this movie is often three people when on-set and just her and I preparing the shoots. You know how long the credits are at the end of a movie at the theater? Replace all those names with us and that’s the work we took on in addition to running our own businesses and my wife was also managing a yoga studio part-time. I learned so much from that burnout experience (another story for another time), and one of the things that stuck with me is resting, and resting often. I can work non-stop all day, but now I rarely do. If we’re really paying attention to ourselves, we hit natural points that signal it’s time to take a break, even if that break is getting a glass of water and sitting and staring out the window for 10 minutes. 

Further on this topic, following your dreams asks you to learn that rest is one of the most productive things you can do to fulfill them. At a certain point, resting helps you get more done than more work will. You have to take recovery time at some point, whether it’s forced from overexertion or done in a healthy way as you move through your projects. The latter is the way that’s sustainable and enjoyable. Rest when you feel tired. You’ll spend your entire life fulfilling your dreams. They continue to grow and evolve as you do. Unless you plan on dying tomorrow, it’s not a sprint. Also, your dreams will never disappear, they’re yours to fulfill no matter how fast you go or how long it takes you to get started. Though I do recommend starting now. Your life is so much more exciting and fulfilling once you do.

I’ll mention one last thing: learning to trust yourself. Often, when we follow our dreams we’ll do something new or do something in a unique way. Sometimes doing something new just means new for us. There will be times when you’ll know that something is the right next step for you, even if you couldn’t prove it to someone else, and in those times you must be able to trust yourself and honor what you’re feeling in your body, that intuition. All of what we discussed so far sets you up to do that, to do it more easily, and to do it well! 

Thanks, shelter-in-place!

So as you’re sitting at home, living a lifestyle you have no reference for, pay attention to what you’re feeling. Sit with it; listen to it. Whether that means taking action on the smallest idea that pops in your head when you’re bored, crying when you feel like crying, or taking a walk or playing a game because that’s genuinely what you want to do most right now instead of “being productive.” This will help you both master what we’ve talked about so far, and lead you to the many other lessons that arrive when you follow your dreams. And for those of you who don’t know what your dreams are yet, this same process will help you uncover old dreams and discover new ones.