The following quotes by Chuck and Blair (from the series Gossip Girl) have reminded me that oftentimes all we need is honest communication about how we feel in particular moments – and I hope they will do the same for you.

And yes, I get it. We can’t break a strong relationship down to some quotes. There’s more to that. We want to grow together and support each other. We want to experience life together and create wonderful moments. Sometimes we want to fight, but we also want to talk about it and find a solution. And sometimes we want to comfort each other.

All I am saying is that we have a lot of opportunities in relationships where words can be very powerful and helpful. And sometimes the action required is simply holding space for one another and being prepared to catch one another. The principle “actions speak louder than words” is obviously not all wrong, but sometimes pure and honest words are all we need to hear from our chosen one. Sometimes words make a huge difference and yet, we don’t give them enough credit. When we started to take things for granted, we somehow forgot that words – just like actions – mean a lot, too.

So, this is just a reminder. Maybe an inspiration. It is not a “how-to” guide. There is no right or wrong. Every person is different and so is every relationship. You shouldn’t feel bad if your chosen one says nothing like that to you. Maybe he or she is not a natural born speaker. Maybe he or she thinks you know it anyway. Maybe words don’t mean a lot to him or her. But if they are important to you, communicate it. Easy as that.

1. When we’re together you’re all I think about.

We assume and expect that. But yet still, it is not always how reality looks like. Sometimes we are not in the here and now when we are together with a loved one because our heads are too preoccupied. But we should be. We can’t get back time, people. So isn’t that an amazing and easy way of telling someone that you are really present when you spend time together and that you wouldn’t wish to be anywhere else right now? Doing that and giving even more credit to it through communication is priceless. Sometimes that is all we want.

2. So the next time you forget you’re (her/his name), remember I’m (his/her name) and I love you.

When we had a bad day, sometimes all we need is someone to remind us who we are and that we are loved. Especially on days like this.

3. Don’t worry. I’ll protect you. I’d do anything for you.

Something that we assume, too. But hearing it from time to time from your partner is a whole other level. Words are really underrated if you ask me – so simple but yet so powerful.

4. If two people were meant to be together, eventually they’ll find their way back.

Sometimes we may have a big fight with our chosen one because that happens in the best relationships. And sometimes it may be such a big fight that both might start to question this whole thing. Wouldn’t it be great if someone takes the first step of action and lets us know that he or she still believes in “us” after all? More power to words, people!

5. The worst thing you’ve ever done, the darkest thought you’ve ever had. I will stand by you through anything.

This one is so important! Sometimes there is stuff we never talked about to anyone. Because of shame or guilt maybe. Sometimes it might really be about the worst thing we’ve ever done or experienced or the darkest thought we’ve ever had. And isn’t it comforting to know that we have someone that we can invite inside the depth of our soul? Someone who wouldn’t judge us for that, someone who would be there listening, someone whom we can deeply trust. Make sure the other person really knows that.

6. I love you. Saying it was hard, but I did, and I never looked back.

We don’t mind if you remind us of that. We love to hear/see/feel that you are all in for us even though it took you a while to realise it.

7. Don’t let anyone tell you you’re not powerful. You’re the most powerful woman I know.

This is particularly for us, girls. Yes, we need to hear this sometimes. Especially when we forgot or people told us we are not. Even if he thinks that we know that he thinks we are powerful. We want to hear it. And even if we know ourselves that we are, c’mon, tell us. We like it.

8. I know exactly what you need done. And I know exactly how you like it.

Oh boy, one of my favorites. (Anyone else here who is getting horny when Chuck Bass says that sentence?) What would we want more than someone who knows our sexual preferences and knows exactly how we like it? Someone who can give us all we need when it comes to sex. And all the more important, someone who knows the difference of us being moody because we are hungry or because we need sex right now, and that particular someone knows how to communicate that while getting ready for action. That is fucking hot.

9. In the face of true love, you don’t just give up. Even if the object of your affection is begging you to.

That’s right. You don’t just give up on true love. Remember that and communicate it if needed. So many people are in love and not together and so many people are together and not in love. And why? Because they don’t talk.

10. Whatever you’re going through, I want to be there for you.

We can’t say it often enough. And we also can’t hear it often enough. Make sure the other one knows it and make sure that you stick to your words. So powerful!

11. If you wanted to play rough, all you had to do was ask.

And finally…oh yes, we want someone who is open to all that kinky shit we are up for. Communicating that makes us feel less “weird” about whatever sexual wishes we have, I guess.

Photo by Pablo Merchán Montes on Unsplash