There is something to be said for defeating the hold your past unjustly has had on you for as long as you can remember. For patterns you fell under, so ingrained into every fiber of your being, that you question if you will ever truly be rid of it. And the complete answer is… no. You will not ever get rid of it. It’s not like the end of a movie where the Hero stands victoriously over his defeated opponent and then moves on with their life, seemingly untainted by the war they had just battled and witnessed. You cannot unsee or un-experience something that has happened to you, no matter how much healing you do. Those experiences have shaped you in one way or another, and that is not something to be ashamed of. It is not saying that, “Everything happens for a reason,” because I think that is bullshit advice. But what I can tell you is that it does not have to become You.

It is like the story of the two sons who grew up with an alcoholic father. One son devotes his life to never drinking a single drop of alcohol, and when asked, tells others, “it’s because I saw my father do it.” The other son also becomes an alcoholic, and when asked, tells others, “it’s because I saw my father do it.” Both sons raised in the same environment, by the same father, yet lived very different lives. Why? Because they both made a decision. A decision based on what they had known, seen, experienced, and if or when they realized they wanted to live the path which they knew, or live differently. It is truly as simple as that.

Your life does not have to be built around pain, bitterness, anger, and resentment. We make decisions subconsciously every day, while “living” on cruise control and not daring to live any differently than what society tells us to believe is reality. We look at celebrities and people that bring about Great Change as some sort of Gods, blessed by the gifts of public speech, or beauty, or whatever it may be. But we forget that they are not any more talented, or beautiful, or interesting, as You and I. The only difference is that they got it in their mind that they wanted to go after something, and they did not stop until they got what they were after!

You will often hear famous actors mention they got turned down for a role, only to be accepted by something even better. Often, we worry ourselves to death about the worst happening that we don’t realize how nearly 99% of the time, that very thing doesn’t even happen! And we wasted a ton of time and energy worrying about that thing happening, when you end up surprised by how much better it turned out!

So, I have a few questions for you to ask yourself, “How much of my happiness have I wasted by worrying and fearing what others would think, how something will turn out, etc.?” “What is the worst that can happen if I were to go after what truly inspires me?” And, “how many times have those bad outcomes actually come true before?” Then, after you assess those questions for a few minutes, I want you to reflect back and ask yourself, “Out of all the Best moments I can recall from my life happening, how many of those moments happened when I was least expecting it?” You never wasted a moment to worry, or anxiously anticipating the outcome, yet something so beautiful happened to you that it imprinted that moment into your memory forever. Often times, something monumental in your life that happens to you actually happens when you least expect it!

Do not worry your life with expectations of the future, or others. You will end up disappointed every time. That is not to be said, however, that beautiful things will not happen to you, because they will! As was said before, great things will happen when you least expect them to! It is about keeping Faith that no matter what, the Universe will always have your back. Sure, there will be struggles and many hurdles along the way because that’s Life, and it helps build our character and figure out what resonates with our purpose and passions in this Lifetime!

I never met a beautiful Soul that did not have some obstacles to face and demons to defeat. That is just as equally a part of life as all the amazing things to be had! That is what makes life worth living! The good and the bad. The easy and the difficult. Yin and yang. Finding balance in what to be grateful for, what to release, what to hold on to… it is all so fucking beautiful it brings tears to my eyes every damn day.

It can be for you too, you know. If you make that decision to start by asking yourself the tough stuff, working through it, and then choosing to move forward into a new way of thinking, living, breathing… making decisions based on who you are and who you want to be – in everything that you do! Before you know it, a year down the road, even 3 months, you will see how you have totally transformed yourself into a person you never knew you could be. In one decision, one moment, that can make all the difference in who you are Now, and who you are to Become. At the end of the day, the decision is up to you; the future is in your hands.