Covid has made its way into our home. It didn’t sneak in from an unknown source in the middle of the night. It wasn’t handed to us during a careless night out on the town with friends. It walked right through the front door with all it’s laundry, books and miscellaneous crap of a 20 year old college student,

I got the call “Mom I have to come home.” Contact tracing indicates our son has been exposed to Covid. Being a year round runner, they are tested every other day. Yes, every other day a small swab has been sent up his nose. They are tested this often in an attempt to keep the team safe. They practice and compete wearing a mask. They are given a strict social bubble to stay within. This leaves a very small window of opportunity for the virus to spread. 

Home just one day, he is confirmed a positive case. Confined to his bedroom and private bath, meals are dropped at the door. He doesn’t come out often and heads out the front door for fresh air when he does. A mild case, his symptoms pass within a few days. Sleeping 16 hours a day makes for a quick recovery. It feels good to be a mom and provide comfort to my independent kid.

Even with all the disinfecting and distancing, I test positive. High temps and a horrific cough have taken over any feeling of normalcy. The house is a wreck with a dishwasher that never seems to stop running. Nights are left standing outside trying to grab a breath of fresh air. I’ll try anything to elevate the pain in my chest. 

As I sit awake in the night I think of the stories I should be writing, The feeling of guilt seeps in that I am somehow letting my mentors and peers down. When the fever isn’t screaming I take comfort in reading the writings of these courageous authors.

Today I sat on the front steps of our home. An afternoon of full sun heats up the granite slabs.  Some how it feels like a personal dose of medicine. Sitting in the splendor of spring, I am amazed at the amount of birds that are within a very small proximity to me. A mix of bluejays, cardinals and chickadees create such a beautiful song. I cannot remember the last time I sat and just enjoyed being quiet during the middle of the day.

Covid walked up these very steps into our home. The gift Covid brought along is the biggest surprise. Sometimes we just need to slow down, breathe and remember to listen to the birds.