My daughter, who is an adult now, was 14 years old when she told her dad and I that she was gay.  I spent a few years hoping that it was some sort of phase and wishing it were not true.  When I reflect on this, I feel regret.  At the time, what she deserved was to be told that she was accepted and loved unconditionally.  While I wish I could go back in time to simply wrap my arms around her and let her know how much I love her, I realize that I must forgive myself.  I just had some necessary growth in front of me. The way I look at it now, wishing the gay away was as ridiculous as wishing her eyes were brown instead of blue.  She is who she is, and that person is wonderful through & through.

Imagine if someone would disown their daughter if she was a lesbian.  I would not get angry; I would feel sorry for her. It is a sad reality that some would choose to throw away a parent-child relationship, failing to realize the beauty it already contains, as it is.  If a person’s sexual orientation is somehow viewed as a problem, it is still just a small part of who that person is.  Many qualities make up a whole person.

When I recall how long I struggled before I could talk openly about this with some of my family and friends, I realize it was all about fear of judgment and losing my own relationships.  I am so much stronger than that now, and I owe it all to my daughter.  She has always been strong, and her strength is another quality that seemed to come prepackaged at birth.