They say some are here for only a season.

And others are here for a particular reason.

I wanted you for life to share in laughter and tears.

I wanted someone like you to turn to with my fears.

Today, my heart no longer beats the same.

I wish it would, but I’m lost in pain.

It’s the kind of feeling that leaves you gasping for air.

The pain of losing a love that is really rare.

They say one day I’ll heal.

Though I’m not sure that I’ll ever be able to feel.

You see, I used to dance and sing with so much joy.

I’d sip my coffee holding your hand and enjoying my soy.

I’d cook and swirl and giggle at every joke.

It didn’t matter that I was broke.

You made me feel welcomed in your home.

Supplying me with a toothbrush and unlimited access to your comb.

I felt safe with you every night.

As you tried to help me, even when I had lost all light.

Complex post-traumatic stress disorder is real.

It’s hard for those who suffer from it and for the love ones who try and deal.

I wish I could be happy the way I used to be.

But the truth is that I was living in a fog that was never truly me.

I want to feel better.

But there’s nowhere to turn.

I just can’t seem to understand why this happened to me and what there is to learn.

I’m writing to the world and asking that you work on supporting our young girls in their youth.

Let’s do better for them and for RBG, also known as Ruth.

Let’s work on helping each out out.

Some of us were not given life’s best route.

Emotional regulation is not easily done, and learning it is not much fun.

Please join me in asking for providers to do better with our care.

Labeling abuse survivors with personality disorders is not fair.

The personalities of these survivors are not bad.

What is disordered is what they often experienced from their moms and their dads.

Please show them the love they never got.

Let’s help support them and show them what they were never taught.

Show them what it means to be truly cared for.

When you do, I bet you’ll watch them soar.

~