We often take for granted the gift of tears. Humans that struggle to cry and those that are unable to shed salt water from their eyes do not take this gift for granted. Human emotions are a gift and they help us heal and grow.

Somewhere on an old computer drive I have a photo of my baby sister riding an Elephant in India. The photo shows her wet and smiling. It was taken right after she fell of the Elephant and it picked her up with it’s trunk and placed her back safe on it’s back.

My baby sister travelled the world after graduating with an undergraduate degree in psychology. She worked, studied and travelled while searching for herself and what she wanted to do in life. I travelled with her in spirit and through our talks, writing and virtual visits. The pictures told stories that words could not convey and the tears from the elephant are one. I myself cried many tears when she was gone and I missed her dearly. I also felt my father’s pain in having her being away and his fear of dying before she returned. I felt that passage of time and a sense of longing. I graduated from university the same time that she did even though we were ten years apart. It was a gift to go to school with her. After I graduated I started a career in healthcare and my life responsibilities as a parent continued. My daughter desperately missed my sister for she was like a sister a sibling that she never had. True love is when you are happy for someone even though you are missing them so we were happy for her and hoped that she would someday return. Christmas time was particularly hard and we felt the pain of separation even deeper.

The story of her elephant ride and rescue was a tender story that remains forever in our hearts. My sister was terrified to ride the elephant and yet this did not stop her in fact she was scared of many things in strange countries and still she explored and learned and settled there. Her story of how the Elephant rescued her from the water was and is not an unusual one. After hearing it we researched and studied more about Elephants. We learned that they seemed to feel and show the emotions of  grief, loss and cried tears. This of course is debated by many in the scientific world. I do know that that majestic Elephant rescued by sister many moons ago and this remains with me a lesson on humanity and the connection we have with animals. I believe my sister cried a few tears that day herself and hugged the Elephant. I remember the look on her face and my father’s face they day she told the story. All of us had tears in our eyes and these tears were of love, joy and gratitude.

If you struggle to show how you feel or feel shameful when you cry remember even majestic Elephants shed tears and what we think is weakness is empathy and strength. Tonight as I write this I feel my father’s spirit and I feel love. As the holiday nears grief also visits. We are not strangers and I welcome grief and tears for these are also expressions of love. If you have a heavy heart this Christmas my hope for you is that  your tears can cleanse you and that you will feel renewed. Feel what you need to feel and let go and embrace the life that awaits.