Congratulations. You broke the cycle of toxicity. This is a difficult decision. You’ve overcome the fear of ending a toxic long-term relationship. What’s next?

It helps to know what to expect following a separation, breakup or a divorce— especially when dealing with a narcissist or an abusive person. It’s not going to be easy. Ending a toxic intimate relationship means ending a book, and beginning a new one— filled with hope. But you still need to deal with the final chapter and some endnotes from the previous book.

Stay strong, tell yourself positive affirmations

Repeat after me: You’re strong. You’re beautiful. You’re enough.

A toxic person will not let it go. A narcissist invested years to make you make you question your self-worth. And they’ll do the same following the end of the relationship.

Be gentle to your mind and heart: remind yourself that you’re not defined by their words.

Don’t except an apology

They’ll not apologize. Don’t wait to hear “I’m sorry.” Apology means empathy. Don’t expect this when ending a toxic relationship with an abusive partner. Learn how to move on without receiving an apology.

Avoid confrontations

Hopefully, you’ve made your case when ending the relationship. Your ex knows what went wrong. You’ll do a huge favour to your mental and emotional wellbeing if you avoid unnecessary arguments.

Expect gaslighting. Expect harassing messages. Be confident and strong when dealing with retaliation.

If you don’t feel safe, know that you’re not alone and there is help available. If you’re being threatened, report that immediately.

Self-care

You were invested in a toxic relationship that drained your energy and time. Now is the time for self-care You’ll need some recovery time. Take the time to do something you really enjoy. Pick up a new hobby, or return to an old one that you abandoned during the relationship.

Carve time for yourself. You’re your priority.