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An active sex life can be important for maintaining your relationship or marriage.
Equally important, though, is cuddling after sex. It increases intimacy and satisfaction and helps your relationship stand the test of time.
Cuddling After Sex: the Low-Down
As with all physical intimacy—sexual and otherwise—there are lots of pretty great benefits that come along with it.
Snuggling after sex releases oxytocin, often dubbed as the “bonding hormone.” When this hormone is released, it can make us feel closer emotionally, and strengthen our connection with our partner.
A more solid connection with our partner can also increase our levels of sexual desire, and this is especially true of people who crave emotional connection.
As well as releasing oxytocin, after-sex cuddles releases dopamine. Dopamine is a feel-good hormone, and along with oxytocin, it makes us feel more content and closer to our partners, which in turn reduces stress in our bodies.
And with increasing amounts of notifications pinging at all hours of the day (and night), anything that can help us de-stress is worth a try, right?
But beyond the pleasurable experience of cuddling and the release of neurochemicals, it has also been shown to positively affect your relationship as a whole.
Specifically, feeling satisfied with your post-sex ritual can make you feel more satisfied with your sexual experience. Thus, you also feel more satisfied with your relationship, too.
However, it’s not actually the act of cuddling after sex that’s essential, it’s being satisfied with what you do after sex generally. This is where all-round relationship satisfaction lies.
Why Some Need Cuddles After Sex to Maintain Their Libido
Sex isn’t just a bodily experience. It’s an intimate dance that encompasses all of us—our thoughts, feelings, emotional baggage, and all. Cuddling after the fact is therefore not just a lovely way to end your intimate encounter, it’s a way to boost motivation for sex.
This is especially true if you struggle with desire for sex in general or find the idea of sex to be pressuring and stressful.
In order to truly want more sex, it’s important to help your brain and body equate sex with something positive. Because if it doesn’t, you will continue to struggle with low or no sex drive.
And snuggling after sex is a great way to help your brain and your body feel like sex is good for you.
A warm embrace can boost psychological closeness and further reinforce that sex is a good idea. Not just because of the act itself, but because of the emotional rewards that follow it during our post-sex ritual.
For some of us, the snuggling after sex holds greater intimacy value than the act of sex itself. This can lead to increased sexual desire because of the anticipation of the post-sex intimacy.
If You Don’t Particularly Enjoy Cuddling
Doing something you don’t enjoy is not conducive to a happy and healthy relationship, so as beneficial as post-sex cuddles may be, if it’s not your thing then don’t feel you have to force it.
Some of us thrive on physical closeness; we feel validated when we are close to our partners and when they show us physical affection.
For others, that kind of affection may feel heavy or even like an invasion of our integrity or space. Especially for those of us who are neurodivergent, physical closeness may be taxing.
Instead of filling us with energy, it may deplete it instead.
Just as consent is crucial regarding sex, the same is true regarding general physical closeness, too. And letting your partner in on how you feel about cuddling after sex helps ensure you both get your needs met.
It’s important to create a post-sex ritual that works for you. If you love cuddling—great! But if you don’t, there’s nothing to worry about. There are lots of other ways to connect after sex, including sharing a meal with your partner, or watching a film together.
How to Feel Satisfied All-Round
Your perception of your relationship can be influenced by lots of factors. These might include previous experiences, your current emotional state, and your pleasure during sexual encounters, to name a few.
One way to boost desire and simultaneously boost relationship satisfaction is by cuddling after sex. The combination of the intimate act of hugging and the neurochemicals released can make the difference between wanting sex again and not feeling so bothered about it.
Now you know the power of hugs, what will your post-sex ritual be?
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