My children were confused and afraid. The fear was obvious on their innocent faces as they held each other in a comforting embrace. Their world had been completely flipped upside down and would never be the same.

My oldest son, who was twelve at the time, reassured the babies that everything was okay and that we were just on a little vacation. As they huddled together I scanned the parking lot, nervously, from the top story window of our hotel room, praying that we got away clean.

For Eighteen years I had been married to their mother. I did everything that I could possibly do for that woman. I felt as though our relationship outlasted so many others because I actually put my wife first. She was the priority in my life, even above my own well being. What I wanted in life didn’t matter. Happy Wife, Happy Life, right? I thought so too. I was willing to sacrifice everything for her. Why, then, was my world falling apart?

For the second half of our marriage, I focused solely on my children. I labored and pushed myself to the breaking point for those kids. Anything that they wanted, within reason, they got. Not because I was a push over, but because they deserved it. I spent every available moment providing for them in the past decade. Working weekends and even out of town, there is nothing that I wouldn’t do for them and they know it. But even with that, my world is still falling apart? Why?

The fight that night was bad. Really bad. The kids shouldn’t have to see two adults acting like that. Especially their own parents. The words we said to one another could have made the devil cringe, not to mention the items flying through the air.

The peaceful times between fighting were getting fewer and farther between. I had to get out of this situation, and I wasn’t leaving without my kids.

That evening, when their mom had errands to run, I packed the bare essentials and took the kids to a hotel. After finding cartoons on the T.V. and reassuring myself that we were safe for the night, I went into the small bathroom to freshen up.

It was at that exact moment that I realized, I had no idea who was looking back at me in the mirror.

I had spent my entire life focused on making other people happy. I had no idea who “I” was anymore. My hobbies, my passions. I had no clue of what made me, well, “me”. Even worse, I had no idea of how to help myself. Nobody likes to admit defeat, but I was completely lost.

It was time to call in the professionals. I hired a family counselor and prayed for the best.

The very first story that he told me would completely reverse the trajectory of my life.

He finally made me realize that you can’t care for anyone at all, until you first take care of yourself.

This was his story…

” A father and son were taking their first plane trip together. This was the first time the little boy had ever been on a real airplane.

The young man squeezed his dad’s hand tightly as he fearfully started out of the airplane window. The father gave him a reassuring hug and explained that there was nothing to worry about.

The dad was interrupted by the sudden jerking of the plane. The boy’s palms became saturated with sweat and panic set in. The father explained that it was just a little turbulence, wishing he could think of a way to calm his son. His only focus in life was the happiness of that little man, so seeing him like this was absolute torture.

Just then, the oxygen masks dropped from the ceiling.

The dad went right into action, doing the only thing he knows how to do. Protect his family. He grabbed his son’s mask and fit it snuggly around his head. Checking to make sure that it was placed firmly around the child’s nose and mouth…the dad’s world starts to go dark.

Before he could even finish securing his son’s mask completely, the father passes out.

The boy tries shaking his father, begging and pleading for him to wake up. It’s too late. The young man is now completely on his own.

What the dad didn’t know is that there was absolutely no oxygen on the plane.

Another thing that the father did not know is that there are six other safety precautions that his child will need to take in order to survive this ordeal.

He was so focused on helping somebody else, that he never even had a chance to put his own oxygen mask on.”

I will never forget the impact that this story had on me. There is nothing more important than our own physical and mental health. Once a person learns how to love themselves, the joy that they radiate becomes contagious.

Your children want to grow up to be just like you. Live a life that you can be proud of.