I was having a conversation with my friend the other day and it was about relationships especially among Nigerians.
I asked her a question about why most married couples in Nigeria never go on holiday together or out on a romantic date and now this day they hardly go to the party together.
What bothers me is that she was very convinced that it’s alright to live like that because it is our culture. We adopt many western culture but when it comes to marriage we will say it’s not our culture. I have a problem with that. We are no more in 60’s . I know in the time of our parent , they are taught differently. Please correct me if l am wrong.
This is how l see it . When we are dating, we are westernised ,we spend most time together , kiss , laugh and enjoy each other’s company , dance to western songs for some of us we will even hide from our parent or make up stories to spend time with our lover. You look at each other eyes and hold hands and at that point nothing matters . You just want to be with her. So finally you are married to her and you now have a full driving licence to be with her without hiding, no more provisional licence and all of a sudden you can not stay at home with her anymore, you can not take her on romantic holiday, you don’t even want to take her to a party because your friends will be in the party with their girlfriends and you will be the odd one out. Something is wrong with the picture. This is a woman you once adored and cherish and now she is all yours and that is when you are out looking for another woman. I know this is common among men but lately, l am hearing of so many Nigeria men sending wife and children on holiday so they can mess around. What stops you from going with your family on Holiday?

I look forward to spending time on holiday with my family once a year . When you go away with your family on Holiday . It is a beautiful time of bonding together as a family . Your wife is not cooking or cleaning . She is relax and the children can sit around you and get to know you more . I do understand men have to work but you still have responsibility to raise your children . This is a fatherless generation and is so painful to see many family broken and women are left to mop the mess . What is the point of having so much money and your children are wayward and they don’t even know you. They just love spending your money.

I was in