The second biggest wellbeing buzzword after happiness, purpose is painted by many as the holy grail of emotional well-being. Study after study shines a light on the emotional, psychological and even physical benefits of discovering and living your ‘why’. But for many individuals these purpose proclamations actually have the opposite effect on their wellbeing.

Purpose anxiety is a real thing – a twenty-first century affliction. Much more than just FOMO, it is the struggle to find or live your purpose, marked by feelings of frustration, fear, failure, social comparison, stress, worry, incapability and inadequacy. For almost two decades I felt the drag and drowning of purpose anxiety in some shape or form.

I found the seeds of my purpose at the young age of twenty, while volunteering with paediatric cancer patients in Romania one summer. But no matter what I did along the nineteen years that followed, I felt that I never got close to matching in action that feeling of purpose that dwelled inside. In recent years I felt the frustration from an undiscovered and unsuccessful purpose more than ever. And I believe this is due, in part, to the sheer amount of purpose noise pollution that has built up in today’s online world.

The purpose racket doesn’t just occupy the realm of wellbeing. It also dominates the entrepreneurial world, where you are bombarded with messages of purpose-driven riches and success. As someone who has tried to live their purpose through social entrepreneurship, I can hand-on-heart attest that the endless tumult of purpose success skyrocketed my feelings of insignificance and inadequacy in making my ‘why’ a reality.

And from the conversations I have had with others who are struggling to find and live their purpose, social comparison is big on the list of reasons why they feel stuck at the starting blocks.

Silencing purpose in the world around us is a huge ask, I know. Limiting the amount you subject yourself to is somewhat easier. But there is something more profound that you can do. There is a silence that you can adopt to help limit the infiltration from the external purpose clamour and help release you from the grips of purpose anxiety.

The silence within.

If I learnt anything over those two decades of purpose uphill struggle, it is that turning inwards always got me much closer to my purpose than paying attention to all the noise around me. Learning to be quiet and still enough to listen to the whispers from within, knowing that you can trust these as the answers to the questions you are so desperately searching for is what will guide you along your purpose journey.

And the only external sound you should pay attention to is the words of those you are here to help. Their voice is the light at the end of your purpose struggle tunnel.

This piece was inspired by Bryony Gordon’s article in the Telegraph titled: I’m going to sit still and enjoy the silence – and you should join me