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Lately, I’m not exactly sure what I’m doing.

I feel stuck, stagnant. I feel the decaying inside, down to my core.

So what’s this all about exactly? I feel like I’m remembering something I forgot a long time ago, something I knew was coming but have been sticking my head in the sand.

What did I come here to remember? What did I forget?

Emotions swirl, like water rushing through a riverbed, and I feel turmoil in my soul. And yet, I see that the noise is just in my head; my human self is acting out again. Why, I ask? To numb the pain? The pain of what, I ask?

What am I forgetting? What did I come here to remember?

The muses have been telling me to write lately, and I say write what? “Write anything,” I hear. “Your words are magic. Your heart is pure. Unleash it all.” A writer with no directive, now that’s a daunting task. If my words are magic, I ought to be sure I know how to wield my sword.

Sword? Why am I carrying a sword? Are we in battle?

“In some sense, yes. It’s up to you to transform that sword into a wand. Can you do it?”

I don’t know, can I? This is where my pesky little friend—doubt—comes in. Yes, of course I can do it. What will you have me write though? I want to be sure my words are used for good.

“The more you are able to tap into your heart, the more you will know exactly what to write. Let it flow.”

Okay, easy peasy, right? What’s up with the heart chakra blockage?

“Oh, that will be moving soon. You’ve been holding on to a lot for many years. Don’t you remember, you asked to ‘feel it all.’ We’ve been watching you for sometime now, Miss Multidimensional.” 

Hmm, okay, so what am I holding on to?

“Deep pain, but it’s not just yours. It’s everyone’s. You’ve asked to feel into the world, so here you go, working that empathy bone of yours again.”

Again?

“Oh yes, you’ve done this before, many times. This time is different, although they always are. But this time is really special. Your light is about to change the world.”

Oh really? How so?

“This is something only you will know. Remember to have faith, little one. Eyes on the prize, heart in the now. Breathe, be patient to receive.”

That’s right. I have been somewhat impatient lately. It’s only because I feel so…lost. Even when I’m surrounded by my most favorite possessions, my books. My books, ah yes, writing. I must be a writer then? Who am I?

“Whoever you desire to be, alas there is the higher way.” 

And what does that look like?

“Go into your heart, and there you will find love, the ultimate love of source, which is you. And remember, no one can ever take that away from you.”

How do I go into my heart?

“Ah, now that’s a good question. We are glad to hear you are asking this question. Keep investigating this, every day. You’re on the right track. Keep writing too, even during the minor setbacks. This is your way out.”

Way out? Way out of what?

“Pain.”

That’s right, I have been feeling a lot of pain lately. I’d love to feel some joy too. Can my life be filled with joy?

“Oh yes it can, sweet child. Keep pursuing the dream. Keep marching forward through the thick of the night. Your time is coming.” 

Love will find a way. Blessed Be.

Dear reader, what is real for you these days? What are you forgetting? And what did you come here to remember?

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