After many years of being home a lot due to illness, I started to feel better and started to venture out and try to make friends. While I had tons of hope and ideas about how this would go, I tried not to have too many expectations. I simply wanted to be make friends with kind people who had a sense of humor. You would think that wouldn’t be so hard, Right. Wrong! What I’ve learned is that people are great as long as there is some sort of need for you whether is financial or emotional. When you can’t do something for someone or someone else better comes along, you get dumped. Don’t get me wrong, I’m an eternal optimist. I will probably always feel like a better day is coming.f The problem is, because I keep sticking my neck out, it really hurts when it gets chopped off.
I get that I’m a quirky, strong woman but I’m also super funny and extremely kind. Now for the caveats–I’m also ethnically Jewish, a lesbian, and a pantheist. Sometimes people love me when they meet me but then I find that they back off when they get to “know” me. I live in a small town so it’s a bit hard to meet like minded folks. I am very accepting of other’s beliefs but I find that it does not get reciprocated. I’m always going to be me. I can’t change that. I guess I need to figure out how to live with the disappointment.
Until I figure that out, I’m going back in my shell for a while to lick my wounds. (Also, did you relate until you got to the 2nd paragraph? Just curious if my demographics made you feel differently about me?)
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