Our meeting was unconventional to say the least, I never once dreamed that as a grown woman with a child of her own I would be choosing someone like you to spend the rest of my life with. At first it mirrored as much of a fairytale story as it could, given the circumstances, but as time went on I was forced to remove my rose colored glasses and view things from a different perspective. How easy it must have been for you to capitalize on the fact that I made the conscious decision to continually overlook the obvious signs of your infidelity on a regular basis.ive considered the fact that on or about the time you are down and out, is precisely the moment that you turn on and up the charm and effort that inevitably has me eating out of the palm of your hand.

How easy it must be for you to create the gaping void in our closeness then turn around and act as if it were my questionable behavior that caused our souls to part. How dare you convince me that my love and effort every time fails to be enough. How powerful it must make you feel to have me grasping at your feet as you walk away. Having me beg for your time and attention must pose as blocks to the building of your ego.

How sad it is that we couldn’t just leave well enough alone…

How immensely empty it feels to have to experience the pain of dual losses. The loss of the only real true friend I have ever known in life, and the loss of my future with the same person. How painful it is to feel like an outsider looking in at the remnants of what I at one point felt to be the most beautiful love story I have ever known. How grateful I have always been to call you mine.

I have loved you for so long that when you finally offered me a chance to warm your heart and touch your soul, it was like a thousand prayers had been answered, it felt like a dream come true.

Then how discouraging it became to have you look at me using the same set of jealous eyes those before you wore. Tragic is an understatement.

You are a foreign feeling to me.intrigueing it is for me to watch you in all your grand gestures and charismatic ways, work me over in ways i know in my heart to be wrong yet I cant help but allow them to feel so right. Never have i ever encountered a being that harbors the ability to be both scorching hot and in the same minute turn around and be ice ice cold.

My mother used to tell me “a fire that burns that hot is bound to burn out” and I am afraid that the motto may have been closely modeled after you. Devastating it is for me to think of the possibility that perhaps you simply lost interest. that maybe the true reason you stay is more a matter of convenience.