We tend to make boundaries about other people when, in trust, boundaries are an internal job.

What do you choose to let in or keep out?

What will you tolerate or refuse to tolerate?

What do you want or not want?

Your capacity to own your boundaries – which we spend a month on in the upcoming 5-month portal to Revolutionize your Relationships – is directly related to your capacity to love yourself, honor yourself, and trust yourself.

You have to trust your body.  Its sensations.  Its yes or no.

You have to trust how you feel and navigate your feelings to receive their wisdom.  Be curious about them.  Look at what’s underneath each one.

You have to trust your desires – or lack thereof.

This allows you to know your boundary.  To receive it in the moment rather than armoring and creating false forms of protection that keep out instead of letting love in. 

When it comes to expressing your boundary, you have to be willing to face the other person’s disagreement, judgment, rejection, or possible abandonment.  These fears are at the root of why you don’t honor your boundaries (when you’re clear on what they are).

This requires deep emotional and energetic work so you no longer allow in what is not yours.

Instead of taking in the judgments of others, you ask yourself: Do I agree?  Is this mine?  Am I judging myself that way?

Another person’s judgment gets to say theirs, but only if you let it by refusing to take it in.

The boundary is internal.  It comes from within.  It does not have to push out against someone.  It doesn’t have to make them wrong or bad. 

You let them choose for themselves, and you choose for you.  What do you believe?  What do you feel?  What do you choose?

Every boundary is simply that: A Choice.