In the aftermath of Helene, scenes of destruction and suffering lay almost everywhere in Swannanoa, N.C. — cars in tree limbs, mangled homes, mud-choked roads and people desperate for water and food. https://t.co/eP7w3FV0Pn

— The Washington Post (@washingtonpost) September 30, 2024

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It’s just my luck that a tropical storm would hit our town a week before my wedding.

But this story isn’t about my botched plans. I was deeply disappointed (and pissed at first). But that isn’t why I’m writing this today.

Tropical storm Helene hit our area in Western North Carolina early Friday morning, and I’m not sure of the latest rain totals—but the flooding is catastrophic. Record breaking. I still can’t fully believe it.

To say it’s been scary as hell is an understatement.

We are one of the lucky ones in Hendersonville, NC. We don’t have power or the internet at home (I am writing this from my workplace that happens to have power and slow internet—I’ll take it!). Our house is intact; we have food and water. We can shower. We are safe.

There are so many who aren’t lucky. There are millions in the South without electricity, internet, or water.

Twenty miles north of us, in Asheville, it is even more devastating than here. Rivers rage in places that were once gentle streams. Businesses and entire towns are washed away. My heart breaks for them.

In our neighborhood, trees and power lines lay strewn across roads. Abandoned cars dot the roads in an apocalyptic-like scene.

However, that isn’t all that is happening. People are banding together. I want you to know that, too.

A local Hendersonville restaurant, Indian Aroma, worked hard to open their doors on Friday and Saturday. They told me that it took them two hours to drive to work, but they made it. I loved their community spirit and fierce determination. It gave me hope. They are also donating free food to city workers and serving cash-only takeout—which was beyond delicious and also tasted like kindness and love.

In the past few days, I have witnessed the best of humanity. And the worst.

I have witnessed neighbors checking on one another with soft, caring smiles, working for hours together to clear trees that landed on homes nearby, forging good spirits, laugher, and connection over tea.

I have also witnessed people hoarding resources at gas stations, yelling at each other hatefully, driving like a**holes, becoming angry and impatient, and withdrawing.

And it tells me what I already knew. This situation absolutely sucks…and we have to take care of each other. We have to care about more than ourselves and TV shows and packages from Amazon.

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve had my internal ups and downs in these past three days. My nervous system has gone from euphoric, adrenaline-filled survival mode (my ADHD brain knows this state well!) to frozen-collapsed-deer-in-headlights-mood (what the f*ck is happening? Are people okay? Am I okay?)

I’m not shaming any of us for being angry and sad and feeling broken or impatient. It makes sense. Of course, we’re going to feel bad. This is one of the worst storms to hit our area—ever. But we must be mindful in how we treat each other and be extra kind when things are already so hard.

I have believed for a while now that community is what will save us and that community is what is conveniently missing from modern-day life.

We work too hard and numb out in front of our phones. Loneliness is an epidemic.

We heal in connection. In relationships. In community.

This isn’t groundbreaking information. I’m not saying anything new. But there’s nothing like a natural disaster to remind us that we have to work together. Share the burdens. Help. Care. Soften.

So at the end of day, yes, a hurricane hit us hard a week before our wedding and we’re scrambling with our plans and I don’t know if I will be able to pick up my just-altered dress that I adore.

It sucks. But also…I am marrying the man I love and I don’t give a f*ck when or where or how it happens.

I am grateful that he is someone who always lends a helping hand to anyone in need. Who is boldly unafraid to care.

I know I’m not the only one with ruined plans. And we’ve made our plans B, C, and D for our wedding. We’ll be okay.

Last night, over a cup of peach tea (what a luxury tea has become!), a neighbor offered us their beautiful backyard for our wedding.

There are moments of beauty sparkling through. It is a kaleidoscope of feelings. The ups and downs are real. It is awful and we are doing our best to be okay. Please don’t forget about us here. Keep checking on your loved ones, donating funds, and doing anything you can.

We have to keep helping each other. We have to keep caring.

If I am taking one thing from this experience, it is that.

Resources to donate to Asheville area:

Red Cross: click here.

Ways to donate and help: click here.

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