{*Did you know you can write on Elephant? Here’s how—big changes: How to Write & Make Money or at least Be of Benefit on Elephant. ~ Waylon}

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For the first time in many years, I slept in until noon.

And it was one of the most refreshing things that has happened to me in a while.

I woke up feeling so re-energized and happy.

I have been struggling with burnout for a few months now. It is not easy to balance working full-time, studying, and being a present mother.

Lately, I have an overwhelming feeling of fatigue and exhaustion.

At first, I brushed it off and assumed that it was the additional responsibilities. But after a while, it became apparent that it was something deeper.

For the last five years, I have worked consistently without a break. The longest I have stayed away from work has been for a week each year at best.

And my body is reaching its limits; the mental strength to get up and get ready for work is dwindling as each day goes by.

I find myself craving the slow paced life; I wish I could take a couple of months off without worrying about money and bills.

I wish I could just exist in the present moment without having to worry about what’s next or what tasks have to be done.

The hardest part about this life is that on those days when I need to tap out, or step back and take a breath, I can’t because I know that I have no one to pass the mantle to, so I have to find this enormous strength to push through and keep going.

The single most determinant cause of a good parent is emotional availability. A parent’s ability to be emotionally present, responsive, and attuned to their child’s needs fosters secure attachment, which is crucial for a child’s emotional and psychological development.

Solo parents are robbed of this beautiful experience. You don’t get to operate a certain way because you are carrying a different type of load.

Especially for us women, solo parenting denies us the privilege of enjoying the highest form of femininity. We have to remain in our masculine energy throughout.

While it is true that solo parents deserve immense praise for their resilience and dedication in shaping the lives of their children in profound ways, it is also important to not glamorize this way of living and acknowledge that it is not an easy life.

We need to normalize asking for help and accepting help when it is offered.

We simply cannot do it all as much we try to.

It is crucial to reach this level of acceptance first and then from there we can learn to surround ourselves with a community of people who understand this great responsibility that we carry and are willing to offer support.

Carrying this load alone will not be in alignment with our own joy. We need to stay in alignment because when it comes to our children, four hours a day with a parent who is in alignment with themselves is more beneficial than ten hours with a parent who is not in alignment with themselves.

We don’t have to feel pressured to emulate how complete families are living. We can look for what suits us and our children as individuals.

We should strive to parent in a way that maintains our joy instead of diminishes it.

Parenting can be one of the most fulfilling and rewarding experiences of our lifetime, if we can learn to allow ourselves to be our own, unique kind of parents. And we will all be the parents we want to be so badly if we can allow ourselves to prioritize staying in alignment with our own joy before anything else…including our children. Because the secret of truly exceptional parenting is understanding this: to prioritize our own joy is to prioritize theirs.

Our children deserve the real us, not the version of us that tries to be someone else for their sake.

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