{*Did you know you can write on Elephant? Here’s how—big changes: How to Write & Make Money or at least Be of Benefit on Elephant. ~ Waylon}

The past is a place that secretly exists within all of us.

Regardless of how happy we are or how extraordinary our present moment is, we can’t easily let go of the past.

It was a substantial place at some point in time that shaped who we were. It was our present moment and everything we had known about the world and how it worked.

Today, the past is a memory. It’s a fuzzy idea that lives in the silent corners of our minds. It may not control us, but it may influence our attitude and the relationships we have with others. It floods us with tumultuous emotions and makes us wonder if we will ever move on.

Moving forward is easy, but moving on is harder than it looks. Maybe our past weighs us down because it’s full of beautiful memories that we know won’t come again. Maybe it’s full of regrets and mistakes that haunt us day in, day out. Maybe our traumas and wounds are too heavy to carry.

Whatever it is that’s momentarily putting our life our hold, rest assured that it’s normal and okay. We can’t just brush off the past and live our days in denial. Rejecting the emotions that the past forces us to feel only aggravates the situation. However, we can make friends with its ugly parts—the dark sides that irritate us.

We begin the process of healing when we understand that we can’t destroy the past. We can only find ways to live with it and make peace with the radical changes it keeps bringing into our lives.

Here are four simple ways to do it:

1. Forgiveness. Most of us keep living in the past because we’re subconsciously waiting for an apology or explanation. Or, we may be regretful and unable to give ourselves grace. Forgiving others and oneself is essential to ensure that we live our present moment peacefully without having to pay sudden visits to the past.

2. Faith. Do you believe that you are exactly where you are meant to be? Whether it is cliché or not, I like to think it’s true. Personally, I’ve always believed that I’m in the right place at the right time. Even when the past weighs me down, I know it has led me here and without it I wouldn’t have a bright future.

3. Acceptance. I know that memories of the past sometimes bring up complicated emotions, but we need to feel them all and accept their presence. We can’t stop or reject them; we can only welcome and embrace them. So ask yourself, what story am I telling myself? What words am I associating with my situation?

4. Learning. I know it may also be cliché, but I think the past has taught us many lessons that we can’t simply discard. Instead of choosing regret, we can seek the opportunities and lessons that our previous failures have offered us. Learning from our past mistakes can help us to achieve better results in life.

~