I was inspired by Chef Gabriel sensually stroking a solo leek in a cast iron skillet on an episode of “Emily in Paris.”

I knew immediately that I had to experience this for myself.

Full disclosure: I am furiously intolerant of garlic and onions—raw or cooked. I had heard that leeks were mild and decided to go for it. They lied.

Having seen Kathy’s Vegan Kitchen last week, she demonstrated how to prep the leek; I was ready. I had trouble trying to gently open the layers to thoroughly cleanse it of dirt, cut it horizontally, and run cold water as I pushed my finger through the center to create a spiral.

Blooper alert—my worst ever. The tofu was hard because I only wrapped it but did not use the green Stasher bag, the shrooms got coated in black pepper, and the leek proved too strong. Short message: it sadly got dumped in the trash bin.

However, here is the recipe.

Supplies: sauté pan, chef’s knife, cooking and dining utensils, cutting board, love, good mood, clean hands, creativity, towel, optional potholder.

Ingredients:

>> Tofu

>> Blood orange or any fruit

>>Veggies: mushrooms any of your choice, leek, any other that your heart desires

>> Spices: mineral salt, black pepper, caraway seeds, cumin seeds

>> Oil: Extra virgin olive oil, sesame oil, ghee or none

Recipe:

Clean the countertops; wash your hands. Mise en place all supplies and ingredients in order of use. Cut the tofu, shrooms, and leek. Carefully open the leek’s leaves, and thoroughly rinse; slice either vertically or horizontally.

Heat the pan with oil and add spices, which must be cooked to release the oils and flavor. Only use organic. Add the blood orange juice and pulp to the tofu, cut, and place in pan on the section with mineral salt. Add the shrooms to the black pepper and the leek to the caraway and cumin seeds. Stir each individual section. Turn off the burner but leave the pan another five minutes to marry the ingredients and give your blessing.

Plate your meal and find a calm place to dine. Cut flowers or plants make wise dining company. Give gratitude: A Leek, a Hug & a Little Bit of Gratitude: 9 Ways to be Thankful Every Day.

Another small win for the tiny blue planet we call Momma Earth and all her sentient beings.

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