*Editor’s note: “Stop covering politics,” some of our dear readers cry every time we post something relephant. Look: politics are life. Equal rights, empathy, fair economy, healthcare. We can’t ignore what’s happening, and you shouldn’t either. Disagree? We’re happy to share your experience here.
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To humiliate a man, you treat him like a woman.

You interrupt him when he talks, you gaslight him, you tell him he should be grateful, you question his legitimacy, you comment on what he is wearing.

We just saw how this MAGA administration wants “peace” the same way an abusive husband wants a “happy marriage.”

We just witnessed toxic masculinity in all its ugliness.

We just saw how desperate these men are to turn back the clock to a time when their oppressive power was the norm.

How they use extremism.

How they need to control women’s bodies.

How they shame the LGBTQ+ community and single women because they display a model other than the “good wife” leaking her vital force at the disposal of her husband.

But they wouldn’t display this behavior so strongly and publicly if they weren’t feeling the pressure, if they weren’t in a rush because of the progress of social justice movements prioritizing the vital force of the planet, of people, especially the ones from marginalized communities who are being crushed by society. This is the model insecure men have thrived on for centuries.

We are all Zelenskyy in that Oval Office.

I don’t mean to compare our position to his. But most of us have an experience imprinted in our body of being bullied by someone physically stronger or financially more powerful. And as women, we have all felt like prey at least once in our life.

We all know the feeling, and you can see on social media that most people are sick of it.

I am not saying it will be a walk in the park for all of us who want and support inclusivity—the “woke,” the people who care. It won’t.

But as the magical Angela Davis said, “No change is possible without hope. No movement is possible without hope.”

Darkness is here and infiltrating the world, but it has been a process. A process in which all of us participated, even outside of how we voted or discussed politics.

So while we might feel powerless right now, we can make choices in our everyday life to reverse this process. It won’t happen overnight, but if we give up and disengage, it won’t happen at all.

As a coach who works with women on power dynamics and nervous system regulation, here are my suggestions on how to use this moment to break down and break through the patriarchy:

>> Create a practice to protect and preserve your energy rather than dissociating and looking away. That’s exactly how oppressive systems thrive, by making our nervous system tired and unable to process the circus they display everyday. If the only way you can cope with tension is disengaging, get professional help to build up the capacity of your nervous system.

>> When trying to counteract bullying, every act of kindness counts. Build a community or join one, on whatever topics matter most to you. Like in an abusive relationship, toxic leaders thrive when we isolate.

>> Support and uplift voices of the marginalized communities. I hope you understand that at this point, with dictators in charge, you can easily become part of a marginalized community from one day to the next. We are in this together.

>> Boycott products from billionaires, or any company that doesn’t make their money ethically, whether through abusing natural resources or people’s life force. Yes, it requires a bit of research but there are so many small businesses giving us alternatives. Search them out and see where you can make changes that are manageable for you and your family.

>> Check what investments your bank is making. Call them and ask. There are new banks engaged in investing only in clean and renewable energies. Yes, power is in our wallet too, even the smallest one.

>> This is the most important to me: be mindful of where your attention goes. Every account we follow that catches our attention by showing off their lifestyle, the big and the small Kardashians, contributed greatly to the emergence of a leader like Trump. They helped, him voluntarily or not, to replace substance and competence with visibility, loudness, and shock value.

How do you know they are sucking your vital force? When looking at their accounts generates a sense of “not enoughness” in your body. Patriarchy is alive because of that feeling. Influencers feeding the patriarchy monetize your attention with that feeling. So Mari Kondo your social media and ask yourself: Does it spark joy, make me feel better, or give me an honest and interesting piece of information? If the answer is no, delete and unfollow.

On a more personal note, writing this article was a way for me to regulate my nervous system too. I am French, so I want to scream: “Take to the streets people. There is something stronger than billionaires and dictators—it’s millions of people together.”

My dad was an orphan because one day at school in 1944, his mother didn’t show up to pick him up. She was taken by the Nazis. He always told me, “It can always come back,” and I have a feeling I can hear him crying from the sky today.

Except this time, we know. We know the kind of world these oppressors want to create.

And we are not going back.

We’ll stay present to make this moment in time the breaking point before real change. We’ll hold the vision. And the world we continue to build, even during this dark transition, will be wonderful.

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