I love rejection. But, don’t get me wrong. If I had a choice between a post going viral, and barely squeaking by with a view claps or likes, I would opt out of rejection. It is a good thing we don’t have that choice because without rejection life would be boring, and very confusing. We would all be going in the wrong direction down a one way street, and nobody would be shouting at us to turn around.

If there truly is a life path mapped out for each of us like I believe, then every failure, mistake and rejection makes sense. I have heard all the arguments about free will. They do not negate the bigger plan/fate theory.

Free will relates to freedom of choice, and we always have it. If we want, we can go back to the same toxic relationship time and again. If we wish to start our morning with some shots of vodka in our orange juice, we will find a way. If we choose to wake up every day, and complain about our dead end job, never updating our resume, we can do just that.

But, when this life ends, and we cross over to never never land, God will be waiting along with our dear Aunt Francis, saying, “Didn’t you hear me? Didn’t you see the signs? Was getting fired not enough? Was your need to get wasted every night not a sign? How about how he cheated on you — more than once?”

This is why I am giving you the answers to the test. So when you face your next mistake, failure or rejection, you do not look at it as doom and gloom. It is simply life’s way of giving us a nudge, saying, “This is not your path, not your person or not your moment.”

How do I know?

I talk to God. When life sucks, and when it is great. And when I called upon God (I call him God. You can call him your soul, spirit, life, Universe, higher self, higher power, source, Daddy Warbucks), and asked him about rejection, I heard him reply, “What if every rejection was a gift in disguise?”

He then showed me an image of myself waiting in line before coming to this life. It looked like the airport terminal, complete with a food court and numbered gates. He went on to show me that when we are about to come here, to have a new life, we all go to this holding place. Some of us drink our Starbucks, or eat our Au Bon Pain sandwich, before boarding our flight bound for a new life. Others read the newspaper, or have a drink at the bar.

I had always wanted to believe that I had a few too many margaritas at the bar and got on the wrong plane; that I was meant to go to Hawaii and ended up in North Dakota. God told me, this was not possible because we each have our own flight attendant, which boards the plane with us, and joins us here on earth. They help guide us, especially when we don’t have a direct line to the boss man. They work for God, acting as our district managers.

My flight attendant, who looks just like Aerial with long red hair, but wears jeans and white high top sneakers, told me that by the time we are at the terminal, the hard part is done. That I did not get on the wrong plane. How I made all the decisions myself about what I would be experiencing in my next life. She showed me how we pick out everything we are to experience from our bodies to our college, even the people we “accidentally” run into on the street. How we all plan our life experiences before we live it, from the miraculous to the heart wrenching. And we are all just here, bumbling around, trying to remember what we decided before we got here. And our mistakes, rejection and failures help us do just that.

You know the saying God gives us only what we can handle in life? Chew on this — you gave it to yourself. God was just your boss who signed off on it. So if you have been having a hard time, or have had many challenges in your life, instead of blaming God or someone else. Look at yourself and ask the question that I have asked myself many times, “What were you thinking?”

Truth is, maybe I did have a few drinks before boarding, as the ride here has been bumpy. But it is only because of these challenges in my life that I am finally remembering that I have given myself good things too. I met my husband at fourteen, and he is UNBELIEVABLE. He has been my rock, and truly loves me unconditionally. I was also opened up to the world of music, books, and use my gift of writing to unravel my imagination through storytelling. I have had the most incredible dogs, as I am sure I have chosen. My friendships have been lifelong and I am blessed with three of the most incredible children.

I know that each amazing gift, along with each challenge was well thought out. When we come down here, we forget. Our flight attendants blindfold us while we are opening our bag of peanuts, and in order to remember, we need to learn to crawl, then walk, then run. If we are lucky, we get to fly — and that is when the fun begins.

Looking back at my life — every rejection, every mistake, every failure was turning me a little to the life I was meant to live. I am still making mistakes because we do that, as humans. We sometimes need to be extra sure we are to walk away from that toxic person or quit that awful job. Sooner or later, we figure out that we all have a purpose, a reason for being here. It is not just to find the best frat party in college, to run that marathon or produce a mini me.

Life is about so much more. And each failure is a gift. Each breakup is pushing you one step closer to finding your soul mate, and maybe it is the guy or girl behind you in the Starbucks. Look up from your iphone the next time you are waiting for your double espresso and see who is standing in front and behind you.

To help you believe that our life has a flow and purpose, look at your life like you are figuring a massive floor puzzle. Do the easy ones first. The borders. Sit down and ask yourself, what choices you can make today that feel right. Do I like chocolate milk or orange juice with my breakfast? Where should I go on vacation? If I could choose anything, what do I really want to wear today?

Once you create your border, it is much easier to fill in the middle pieces. Those harder questions like, Where is my soulmate? Why am I here? How can I change my life?

While you wait for the answers, get busy becoming grateful for all you have. And Keep working on the puzzle of your life. With each piece that fits, you will feel peaceful, relieved, happy, even accomplished. Conversely, If you try and shove a piece in that does not fit, you will feel out of sorts, anxious; it is even painful.

If you miss any of it, you will have a chance to do it over again, to get back in line. But I always think, why would I want to do it all again? Why not learn our lessons now, and then next time, I know it is not a mistake when I get in line for Margaritas. I am just here for the party.