I have recently semi-retired and a good friend of mine is also semi-retired.  My friend, Horatio, whose name I changed to protect the innocent, suggested that we go camping. That sounded like a great idea to me. I’ll be able get away from the hustle and bustle of suburban life and my daily routine.

I already have an established prayer and meditation practice, but now I’ll be able to pray and meditate in the beauty and surroundings of nature.

By the way, I haven’t camped in over 40 years. Little did I know… The first night we camped at the camp grounds of Enchanted Rock near the ranger station. The sleeping bag I used, which was recommended by Horatio, was too thin, I froze my ass off and I was miserable. During the night I was tossing and turning, I finally put on more cloths, I was getting a scratchy throat, I was stressed out and worried that I was going to catch a cold. It finally dawned on me that I could zip up the outer lining of my tent, and I was finally able to sleep. The next morning, we took a shower, took down our camp site, and packed up our tents, and our camping gear, ready and eager to embark on three days of camping bliss at the primitive camp site in the beautiful Enchanted Rock.

My back pack, which had my gear, food and water, was too heavy because I am still a pretty inexperienced camper. It was only a three- or four-mile hike to our camp site, but because I’m not used to that much walking with a heavy back pack, by the time we got to the camp site I was totally exhausted and I was worried I was getting a blister. So, I decided to take a nap. After the nap we prepared a meal by putting some water in a dehydrated package. It turned out very good.

Now I thought I would meditate and pray immersed in the beauty of nature hoping to go deep into inner bliss. The friggin gnats were swarming in my eyes, in my ears, up my nose, up my butt. I was in total misery. Completely tormented. I used some insect repellent, it was dripping off my nose, it made me smell like insect repellent, it made me feel like I had poison dripping off me, besides it didn’t even work.

Horatio decided to go on a hike in the natural surroundings, I decided to take another nap. When Horatio returned, I thought only fifteen minutes had elapsed but it had been an hour and half. This was Horatio’s vacation, and he had invited me to join him for four days at Enchanted Rock. Sadly, I was not a happy camper, now I see where that term came from. After not even spending one night at the primitive campsite, I was ready to go back to civilization. I was totally dejected and humiliated.  I cried and whined to my buddy “I’m ready to go back”. Horatio graciously relented and we went back without spending one night in the beauty of the Enchanted Rock. Maybe I’m not into nature as much as I thought. Maybe I won’t do camping this summer.

So, for plan B. So now I will try going to the beach or to the lakes or rivers to soak up some of the sun’s rays and bathe in the sun. So, when I go to the beach, I don’t really like to go swimming that much.  I like to commune with the sun, I am a sun worshiper, but I also like to check out the beautiful women in their beautiful bathing suits.

I have been practicing yoga and prayer and meditation for 50 years. I have been praying to God for the beauty and the glory of God, for kindness, for God to teach me how to love God, and how to love myself and how to love others, but after all these years I still enjoy the beauty of women.

Jesus said that we can not serve two masters, we can not God and mammon. I am conflicted by this. I love God, and I also love women. Sometimes after a meditation session I can overhear people say, “Look at Sam, such a state of samadhi and inner bliss he was in.” Little do they know sometimes in my meditation I am in the bliss of God and sometimes thinking about naked women. It is sad and pathetic after all these years this where I am at. Oh well, it is alright, I love both.

Even if not at the beach I will still do what I always do, whether it is summer time or not. I will still practice my prayer and meditation, pursuing the love of God, grateful for this gift of life. This life is a gift, giving us the opportunity to cultivate the love of life and love of others.

~Sam