Somehow we put me on a pedestal about how I can really talk about my feelings. It’s not true. I think we set me up for a road to emotional intelligence, as a foreshadowing. This is a work in progress, and I will own it.

I want to be fully transparent with you.

I was sensitive to our connection. There were times when my fears of rejection got the best of me.

What I wanted was to stay, but I ran. Old habits die hard. But when it comes to the true love of anything, it teaches us to reach beyond what we think we are to embrace what we truly are. What we love gives us courage, solely because we love it, and entirely unintentionally. It is a spiral more than it is an ending, even when we think it is definitely over.

I’m waiting for that moment when I have confidence and authority, to knowingly say there are rare instances in life when everything feels wrong but for the right reasons. Then the lesson is won, and the power of love is earned. It’s then we are brave and mature enough to handle the battles. To finish our sentences. To follow through on dreams, present in the moment and ready to make an impact. And I will not stop until I am through to this point.

For now, I want to take a small step and not emotionally hide myself. To hide my vulnerability and sensitivity is actually a painful thing. Emotional Intelligence is a noble pursuit and I know now why that is so. I want my future to see all of me. That is and will always be the only purpose of ever loving anything, and is the greatest lesson we can ever teach ourselves, and choose to be teachable for.

These aspects of our experience deserve full attention and have to be taken seriously. Any mechanisms to cope or back down from our ability to grow, can be acutely witnessed by the eyes who can courageously see and share their vision. Love teaches us to help others fight for themselves. And I respect your timing and I respect what your decisions are. But just know, this is what I want for you, too.

I had to let it and myself free by saying it, so that I could be closer to the strength of who I am. And now I am. And that is a beautiful thing.

When we know, we know because the energy makes us want to remain open and want to belong. It is collaboration. It is commitment. It is the courage of love.

There is a difference when fleeting situational crushes and ideas have their time and demand to be experienced. They eventually become chapters of the story that have now adorned themselves as facets of our personalities and perspective. We all teach each other about everything that we are, and it is so necessary.

You are different. You’re in me somehow in a way that seems timeless, because I recognize you. That is when I knew.

I’m glad I was reminded that the connection didn’t live in everyone. And as someone who only searches for truth, I am so, so grateful. We can fight for all of us, but it is still true that there are certain people we fight the battle with.

Through upswings and downswings and pain and joy, this has been The Immutable Lesson: We hide from our truth only as long as we are willing to.

It’s not up to the mind or what it thinks should happen, after all. And as I abandon what I thought it would be, I also abandon any falsity, and I see the truth. I reach more fiercely for what I know I am, including every piece and part I was afraid of. And nothing gets rejected in the bunch.

It is collaboration through love that we learn the ins and outs of our perceived shortcomings, our pitfalls and our blind spots. We have love to thank as the lesson which teaches us about everything we are. As I uncover a Soulmate in you, I am reminded of the partnership I have with myself. This is when we know the battle to be won is far different than we may have originally suspected.

Love means we are committed to ourselves, and the dance with the Soulmate is life’s most generous lesson back to that truth. That is why it makes such a huge impact without us realizing it at first; the catalyst as the great awakener. Lifetimes of self-work can be done because of one single encounter. We remember ourselves through each other, and then we are reminded of everything we are meant to be, once again. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.