I oftentimes wonder why do I feel alone with so many people around.

How many of us feel like this?

I have this book resting on the table, in front of me, as I write.

Charles Bukowski’s ‘You get so alone at times that it just makes sense’.

This arrived today. I am three poems down.

I bought this on a whim, after it was referred to in another book I was reading.
Through the pages, he describes some of his days, events, drowsy nights and moments of solitude.
One of those great books that will bring you to reality, with a knowing smile, endlessly. I like it very much.
I don’t have words for how much I need this right now.
It is like he spoke for all of us. In truth, why do we feel so, if we don’t miss anything? Is this in the human nature?

In an alternate setting, I picture this-

• I am watching the sun set in my porch with my hair loose and a book to hold. The sky is a combination of oranges and light greys disappearing into the hill, afar. There is a breeze but it’s warm, so I let it soak into my tired evening skin.
• I am sitting in the shade of twilight and smile for no particular reason, maybe the joy of nothing to do in the moment. contentedness is the word for it.
• My muscles are relaxed, no nerve twitches, in the company of people who make me feel seen. Goodness, this is the place I would rather be!
• I am singing a song, while making my bed and kinda dancing to it, because it just hits different. I feel the lightness in my soul, maybe temporary and go with it, having fun and not caring who sees.
• I look deep into the eyes of someone I know and see their beautiful heart. It will change my life for the better, when I do that little excited thing, of telling them about it.
• I see a new place and my body and soul is warm and fills with curiosity, with wonderment, because everything new that comes my way, takes away a little more pain from what I already knew.

These are the moments to be patient for.

These are the days I want to live for .

Photo- Author’s own