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Not preaching, just processing: every time we undergo a big change in life, or sometimes even a small one, we go through this process of grief.

It would be nice if the steps were clear cut and in order but they are not. It’s never easy to grieve, but it is necessary to grieve in order to live your best life—the life you were meant to live.

This is true for the losses and changes we have experienced during the pandemic. Life will never be the same again. We are all growing and learning. We are not the same people coming out of the pandemic that we were when we went into it. How could we be? After therapy and a lot of self-reflection (OMG, an intense amount of reflection!), I “think” I hit the “new strengths spot” finally, hopefully…but this could go back into denial at any moment.

Sadly, the one thing I’ve realized is that the pain of grief doesn’t hurt less depending on the size of the change. Pain likes to go all in and take no prisoners. Grief has no timeline; it’s there until you accept it and feel it. However, I think I am finally in a place where I can respect the journey and accept it for what it has been, and still is.

Trying not to fight the process when things come to an end. Trying not to find answers through the acceptance of others. We (and when I say we, I mean me) need to learn how to let go with grace. Be grateful for the experience and be excited for the new sh*t that is going to happen next. No drama, no fighting, no trying to prove yourself to anyone but yourself. This is easier said than done. Believe me, I know. But with practice, it does get easier.

We must practice putting our mental health first. We must practice standing up for ourselves. We must practice letting other people have boundaries. We must practice not taking things personally. We must practice listening to ourselves. This life is about doing what is best for us, and not everyone else. We have to make sure that the people in our lives love and respect us the way our soul needs to be loved and respected. Only then can we truly show up for our relationships. There is really no other way to heal.

It’s time to level up. Time to make people uncomfortable. Time to speak your truth. Growth is uncomfortable. Do those things that scare you. Say the thing you would never dare to say. Be an active participant in your life and not a passive bystander. Enjoy the journey. Stay curious. Dig deeper! What comes was meant for you and what leaves was not meant for you. Don’t chase, attract! Keep on swimming—you’ve got this! (And by you, I mean me.)

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