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Mother, father, child, brother, sister, friend, healer, and lover all in one—those are the roles we need to be ready to embody in order to be in a healthy and conscious relationship.

I have worked with thousands of clients as well as on myself over the last decade as a Spiritual healer and mentor, and I can assure you that the one thing that we are all looking for is love.

I have been divorced, in a couple of failed relationships, on dates, heartaches, and then I found my one true love, myself.

With that came divine love I never thought was possible. Love is the carrot of life that keeps us going through battles and lessons in search of something that has always been there, our divine self.

Life is, after all, a journey back to our light.

When we finally unite with that part of us, if we ever do fully and completely in this lifetime, or even partially, we experience euphoria, ecstasy, and liberation.

From that point, we are no longer in search of anything or anyone, and just like that, we start to experience the most blissful loving relationships with everyone. We fall in love with all. We wish for everyone to experience such bliss.

The truth is no one is going to try to make us happy or save us because that is our own responsibility.

The truth is, even if they did try, it wouldn’t be enough until we come into alignment with our true divine self that is unconditional in love, happiness, and light. It is impossible to see the love that is being offered when we are cluttered by our shadow or the ugliness of yesterday.

The insecurities will keep playing their game in the background.

To let go of this, we need to release society’s conditioning about love and relationships, release the expectations that had been placed on relationships, let go of our past wounds, limiting beliefs, and shadows.

All these things keep us stuck in a toxic pattern, causing us to manifest our mirrors and experiences that are absolutely necessary so that we can open up and say to ourselves, “No more of this misery!”

Then and only then we understand that there is no perfect relationship and that the love of your life that we see in the movies does not exist in reality.

Yes, it is a bitter truth to swallow. However, to experience liberated love is far beyond such shallow connections.

When we are in union with the sacredness of another, the conversations, the silence, the triggers, the intimacy, and sexual connections are at a completely different level. We will be healing together through our triggers and creating and experiencing intense love through intimacy.

We look forward to a deeper connection and ask ourselves, “Can this go any deeper?” The truth is that we can. Once we connect with our true selves, we liberate ourselves and allow unconditional love to enter our lives.

Here is one of my favorite definitions about relationships that I’d like to share with you:

“A perfect relationship is a healthy relationship where two people who are aligned to their inner being come together with the understanding that there is no perfect person or perfect relationship. While we may have done our inner work and healing, we understand that healing is a lifelong process.”

Hence we must consciously be ready to take on the roles of mother, father, child, brother, sister, friend, healer, and lover at different times according to the specific situation we are in—that’s what it takes to be a divine soul mate.

A divine soul mate is the combination of all roles in one.

Knowing when to forgive like a mother, be courageous like a father, vulnerable like a child, standing up for each other like a brother or sister, communicating and playing like a friend, being in our power to have compassion and empathy like a healer, and enjoying intimacy like a lover.

When we are able to hold this space for ourselves, then and only then can we hold this space for another.

In this space, we are not a victim or a doormat. There is no need to try and please the other or expect the other to please us. There is no need to control the other due to our limited belief in ourselves.

Love is to be cherished and experienced—not owned.

We must be willing to let go of the expectations and focus on the feeling. We are simply evolving through feeling, not thinking. There is no judgement because we understand that no one is perfect. Especially not us.

Relationships fail when we are operating through our shadow. When we are in attack and defence mode instead of divine mode. When we are in union with our true divinity, we are operating through unconditional love and power. From that point, we help each other come back to that place every time we start to slip away.

When our soul mate is in the presence of our divinity, it will bring out his/her divinity, and the relationship will become a divine union.