Treasuring the Moment

In the summer1976 on the 4th of July, I was 19 years old.  My family and best friend were altogether at our house.  My dad had stopped by as he often did even though my parents were divorced.  The morning had started out as a slow, hot, boring day ahead as we all felt the lack luster of the holiday with nothing to do and no where to go.

My dad suddenly suggested that we all go down to what we had come to lovingly refer to as The Land.  The land was a 7-acre plot in the farming district of New Jersey that my dad owned and planned to build a house on. At that time, it only contained a 3-room shack that he had fixed up and the land itself which we seldom wanted to visit anymore.  But for some reason or maybe because it was a holiday, the idea of going down there and having a BBQ felt exciting to all of us. My dad even invited my mom and the family dog.

There was this build up of excitement slowly taking hold in all of us as we began to plan it all out and make preparations.  Suddenly there was a flurry of activity as we all came up with ideas for our trip down there.

My job along with my friend and my mom was to prepare the food to take with us. I spent most of my time making the salads.

It was the first time in a long time that my entire family were going to be together again.   But I wasn’t aware of that fact right then. We were all grown up now and pretty much went our separate ways, only seeing each other in passing. I believe that’s what made the day all the more special.  And it didn’t matter that it wasn’t going to last, we just ran with it.

As I continued preparing the food, making potato salad in the kitchen, out of the blue, I heard what I thought and felt was a voice.  It said, “Enjoy this day, it will be the last time you will all be together”.

The voice was loud enough to stop me in my tracks as I felt it in my entire body. I immediately froze. I knew with certainty that GOD had spoken to me.

As I tried to make sense of what was just said, trying hard to convince myself that it wasn’t true, that I was being silly to let that voice dampen my day.  But there was no amount of convincing, that would or could, change what my soul was telling me. 

I spent the rest of my day trying to enjoy the time spent with my family, I was in a dazed like mentality as I tried to record every nuance of what was being experienced, while also experiencing periods of melancholy.  It felt like it was the very last time, I would ever taste a delicious meal in my life again.

Looking back throughout my life I have had similar experiences of voices and situations that I knew or would come to know the outcome of in advance.  I’ve been humbled by this sense of knowing and considered it a gift of foresight from God that has helped me and others to navigate life’s path.

But it was this special 4th of July that still holds power to carry me back to a time in my life that If given a choice I would not wish to repeat.  As I look back over the past 46 years since that happened, much has transpired.  There have been weddings, births, and deaths within my family, along with my vain attempts to bring us all together again.   But there has never been nor will there ever now be a repeat of that special 4th of July day, when we were all together again.

It reminds me of a tv show I use to watch years ago called   Walton’s Mountain when all of the children would say goodnight at the end of every episode as they called each other’s names out.  I was always struck with a nostalgic feeling of a time in history that once past can never be repeated.  One of the ways I practice living in this energy is by keeping a daily gratitude journal which I write in every night before I go to bed. I see it as a way of paying it forward towards another day of promise without any expectations, while being excited about what’s possible.  The ample rewards more than pay for themselves.