Today, I am not looking for the good

Today, I am not trying to turn the broken glass so that it reflects the light and makes a rainbow

I am not bleeding

I am not writhing in agony on the ground

I am not even feeling pain

I am simply done

I am done with platitudes

I am done with quippy sayings

Please take your pretty quote and put it away somewhere, gently

and not anywhere near me.

I will light it on fire.

I am done.

I have walked on coals

I will do it again

Probably soon

I know where I’ve been and it is not over

I don’t need surface petting for this one

I don’t need to turn that frown upside down

My insides are not here to be gently maneuvered into a more pleasing shape

I have walked down into the deep and very dark places

I have looked them squarely in the face

I am not afraid of them

I am not going to try to make them pretty

Please do not ask me to.

My survival depends on truth and truth alone

I will not hide from it

I will not turn away and try to pretend that that broken edge is not sharp

I will not let it cut me

but

It does not make rainbows today 

It does not make rainbows today.